Topics of Conversation...

[Corry]

...ok, so the boyfriend and I have been dating nearly two years now, and basically living together since late May, so we've spent a LOT of time together. Lately our conversations seem to be in a rut...talking about the same things over and over again. "Did you have a good day? How was work/school? Yada yada yada blah blah blah." I've been trying to think of some more thought provoking topics to bring up, but just keep thinking of the same old things. So...I was just wondering...what kinds of things do you talk about with your signifigant other? What are some more 'thought provoking' topics?

[Vmann]

Something I've found that will help create conversations for you or date ideas is to wright down ten things you really want to do or goals you wish to accomplish. Then when you do one of them you write down a new one so you always have ten. Split the list five for you five for him. Know you will always have something to look forward to doing or talk about doing in the upcoming days, week, years.

[ferny]

Go out, share some time together away from the four walls. Spend some time apart and do the things you love doing but the other person doesn't.

Erm, there must be something else you can do other than talking, but it escapes me...

[Corry]

Quote:

Something I've found that will help create conversations for you or date ideas is to wright down ten things you really want to do or goals you wish to accomplish. Then when you do one of them you write down a new one so you always have ten. Split the list five for you five for him. Know you will always have something to look forward to doing or talk about doing in the upcoming days, week, years.

That's definately a good idea, in more ways than just a topic of conversation, too.

[Corry]

Quote: Originally Posted by ferny

Go out, share some time together away from the four walls. Spend some time apart and do the things you love doing but the other person doesn't.

Erm, there must be something else you can do other than talking, but it escapes me...

We do plenty of things besides talking...we don't talk enough. That's the point of this thread, silly.

[ferny]

What I was saying was.... do things which will make you talk. If you go out you will find topics with ease.
If you're asking for us to give you ideas for in depth conversations (I don't think you are), then I think that's something you'll have to come up with yourself. It's not the sort of thing outsiders can really help with.

[Corry]

Quote: Originally Posted by ferny

What I was saying was.... do things which will make you talk. If you go out you will find topics with ease.
If you're asking for us to give you ideas for in depth conversations (I don't think you are), then I think that's something you'll have to come up with yourself. It's not the sort of thing outsiders can really help with.

Sure it is. Vmann already made a fantastic suggestion. Unfortunately, I work 3 jobs, and he work and goes to school...getting out of the house is rarely an option, but we do whenever we can.

[Corry]

No other ideas for me?

[Meysha]

I know where you're coming from hun. Never spending time with the boyfriend is really tough. And then when you are together to only be talking about the same things is such a drag. Maybe, like ferny said, you need your own seperate hobbies - so you can talk about those to each other. Like with me for example. Adrian is in a band - so he tells me about all that goss and hissy fits everyone is having blah blah blah. I like the photography and language and uni stuff, So I talk to him about that. Although now he's getting more interested in photography than me! So I've lost one of my hobbies. Nooooo!

I reckon the plan that Vman came up with is good too. It'll help yourself as well as your relationship as well.

Why don't you do some reminiscing with erik about the first time you met? Or go somewhere together you've never been before in your own town?
oh and this might seem strange... but if you got or have some friends who are just yours... ie not his as well.. then maybe spend a bit of time with them chatting and then you can talk about all that with him.

I dunno though, coz me and age always have so much to talk to each other about - or even if we don't we'll just listen to music and chill out together without saying a single thing. That's what I love most.... the comfortable silences. Although I can see how it would get annoying if that's all you had. :-(

Or just tell him that you love him. It'll make him smile, and then you'll feel good too!

[Meysha]

Quote: Originally Posted by ferny

If you're asking for us to give you ideas for in depth conversations

Tell him one of your deepest darkest secrets or fears. Even if you've already told him. See what happens, he might wanna hear about it again... or he might not even realise you've already told him. hahaha!

[Corry]

Thanks Meysha. The thing is, I talk to him plenty...I don't want more thing to tell him about...I'm trying to think of topics we can actually have discussions about. He's not the type to talk about his boring day to me, so I usually have to initiate and ask him 'how was such and such' and that even goes for his hobbies (computer stuff mostly). He does talk to me about baseball fairly often though...but that can only go so far. We can only have so many discussions about Mark Priors' fast ball!

[Meysha]

Just one afternoon bring up what baby's names you like. I find that usually gets a reaction from my boyfriend!!

[Corry]

Quote: Originally Posted by Meysha

Just one afternoon bring up what baby's names you like. I find that usually gets a reaction from my boyfriend!!

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He'll be in another state by the time I'm done with the first sentence!

I sometimes ask stupid outrageous stuff just to see what he'd say, and not too long ago, I asked him what he would do if I told him I was pregnant with twins, and his response was something like "hide" or something. Hahah...funny stuff.

[Meysha]

That's so funny! my bf freaked out the first time i mentioned it too, but after a while he was coming up with names too! That was scary!!

Tell him, you'll give him a massage but only if he tells you something interesting (or not so interesting) about him/his day.

[photong]

You need a hobby to share together. If you already have one, get another/new one. Not sure what things you have done, and are into, but go rent a movie once a week and talk about it all week (reminisce about it).

Read the same book, and talk about it.

[Corry]

Quote: Originally Posted by photong

You need a hobby to share together. If you already have one, get another/new one. Not sure what things you have done, and are into, but go rent a movie once a week and talk about it all week (reminisce about it).

Read the same book, and talk about it.

We have photography in common. Though it is a good idea...I'm trying to get more into his video games and talk about them with him...I'll have to think on that one...maybe there is something else we can do together.

[Alison]

Quote: Originally Posted by photong

Read the same book, and talk about it.[/font]

That's something I was going to suggest. My ex was a non-talker, it just wasn't something that he liked to do. He prefered quiet and I.....well......I'm a talker so it was hard.

Aubrey and I talk about most everything. Our dream house, financial goals, the baby, the boys, our days at work, photography, fears, hopes, etc, etc, etc. Did this change when you guys were living together? Maybe he just feels talked out at the moment. I know that school can be draining too, there are some nights when I just want to come home and have quiet after a day of working and classes. One thing I really like to do (that we never seem to have enough time to do!) is go to a book store and just browse through the photography, or any other section and point out things of interest.

Living with someone is a big adjustment, and if you're a talker and he's not as much it just takes some getting used to

[Corry]

The book thing is a good idea...just not sure if it'll happen right now. He has told me he used to read a lot, but not anymore because he just doesn't have time. Though if I ever get back to reading 1984 we'll be able to talk about that!