25 PHOTOGRAPHIC TRUTHS

Discussion in 'Beyond the Basics' started by nikon90s, Sep 4, 2004.

  1. nikon90s

    nikon90s TPF Noob!

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    I did not write this but it is very funny!!!


    25 PHOTOGRAPHIC TRUTHS

    1. The best scenic views are clearly designated by highway signs reading NO
    STOPPING ANYTIME.

    2. Edward Steichen owned a three-legged dog, which he named Tripod.

    3. The Post Office folds all parcels containing photographs.

    4. Camera straps never fail above soft surfaces.

    5. Lens caps and cable releases can become invisible at will.

    6. Spotone bottles are designed to tip over when the cap is removed.

    7. Financial success in photography is directly related to proper choice of
    subject matter. Falling airplanes, exploding volcanoes, and certain
    Presidential motorcades work best.

    8. No two light meters agree.

    9. The work "Daguerreotype" cannot be spelled correctly.

    10. A new Hasselblad would take better pictures than your present camera.

    11. 1/60 at f/8 is the correct exposure for all photographs.

    12. When your friends finally realize that you are a true artist, committed to
    making sensitive and meaningful images, they will ask you to photograph their
    wedding.

    13. Color slide viewing cures insomnia.

    14. On any tripod, only two legs work properly.

    15. Dust spot are attracted to sky areas.

    16. YES, PHOTOGRAPHERS DO IT IN THE DARK... but they have to stop every
    thirty seconds to agitate.

    17. There's nothing wrong with a 35mm that a 4x5 can't cure.

    18. Ansel Adams has three Secret Zones known only to him.

    20. Fast films compensate for slow photographers.

    21. Mounting a photograph is a misdemeanor in Arkansas.

    22. Owning more than one lens assures that you will always have the wrong
    lens on the camera for any given picture.

    23. A camera store will charge $75 to repair a camera that has been adjusted
    with a butter knife.

    24. Falling lenses are attracted to rocks.

    25. Into every life a little grain must fall.







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  2. Alison

    Alison Swiss Army Friend Supporting Member

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  3. terri

    terri Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

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    Some of those are pretty cute... :D Thanks for posting this!
     
  4. Corry

    Corry Flirtacious and Bodacious Supporting Member

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    I like em!
     
  5. Corry

    Corry Flirtacious and Bodacious Supporting Member

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    I like em! We could probably add some of our own to this... like

    The best photo oppurtunites occur seconds after you've shot the last frame on the roll! (or seconds after the memory card fills up!) (this has been my experience)
     
  6. malachite

    malachite Heavily Medicated For Your Protection

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    Oh so true. This is why I always bring twice as much film with me than what I expect to shoot.

    But that in turn creates another situation that drives me crazy. If you're lucky enough to to get another roll loaded before an encore of fading light, you're then stuck with 2/3rds or more of a roll in your camera until the next time you go out. And it's always those first few frames from the previous outing that stand out in your mind as being the best.

    This is especially true for me when doing the moonlight thing when you only shoot one week out of the month. Always seems to be half a roll left in my 'night' camera that has to wait an entire month before it gets to be seen. :roll:
     
  7. mentos_007

    mentos_007 The Freshmaker!

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    absolutely true! So if I suit to every truth I'm a real photographer? :D:D
     
  8. Harpper

    Harpper TPF Noob!

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    That's some funny stuff. Thanks for sharing it. :D
     
  9. ksmattfish

    ksmattfish Now 100% DC - not as cool as I once was, but still

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    :lol:

    There's some other dimension slowly filling up with my lost left socks and lens caps. I just lost one 2days ago.
     

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