are you Irish?

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by ferny, May 15, 2008.

  1. ferny

    ferny TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Messages:
    8,115
    Likes Received:
    64
    "Can I have some Irish Sausages, please?" asked the Irishman, walking
    up to the counter. The assistant looked at him and asked: "Are you Irish?"

    "If I had asked you for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was
    Italian"? Demanded the Irishman indignantly.

    "Or, if I asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was
    German?"

    Then, warming to his theme, he went on:
    "Or if I asked you for a Kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was
    Jewish?

    "Or, if I asked you for a taco, would you ask me if I was Mexican?
    Would Ya? Would Ya?"

    The assistant said: "Well no".

    Suitably encouraged by the success of his logic, the Irishman steps it
    up a gear.

    "And if I asked you for frogs legs, would you ask me if I was French"?
    "What about Danish Bacon, would you ask me if I was Danish?"

    "Well no, I probably wouldn't," conceded the assistant.

    So, now bursting with righteous indignation, the Irishman says, "Well,
    all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Irish just because I asked
    for Irish sausages?"






    The assistant replied: "Because you're in f***ing Homebase!"
     
  2. ferny

    ferny TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Messages:
    8,115
    Likes Received:
    64
    A man goes to the doctor as he has a problem with the insignificant size of his manhood.
    He says, "Doc, I need your help. Every time a girl sees this they can't help but laugh." The doctor replies, "Well, the only thing I can offer at the moment is still in the early clinical trials stage. I'm not sure if it's for you."
    The man starts begging that he'll try anything so the doctor goes on to explain. "Well," he says, "We take the extract from a baby elephant's trunk and inject it into your "problem area."
    The man agrees to the treatment and after a week or two he is seeing a distinct improvement. With this new found confidence he meet's a lovely lady and decides to take her out for dinner.
    So, there they are, enjoying each others company when the starters are brought out. Suddenly, the man feels a movement in his underwear, and without warning his dick rips through his trousers, reaches up and grabs the bread roll off the table before withdrawing back from whence it came.
    The girl, with a twinkle in her eye, says "Wow!!! That was amazing do you think it could do that again?"
    The man, through watering eyes and clenched teeth replies, "Probably but I'm not sure my arsehole could take another bread roll!!!"
     
  3. lostprophet

    lostprophet No longer a newbie, moving up!

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2006
    Messages:
    11,770
    Likes Received:
    109
    Can others edit my Photos:
    Photos NOT OK to edit
    same thing happened to me
     
  4. SBlanca

    SBlanca TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2007
    Messages:
    405
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gibraltar
    Can others edit my Photos:
    Photos NOT OK to edit
    haha nice one
     
  5. JohnMF

    JohnMF TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2005
    Messages:
    3,009
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    UK
    haha, that first one made me laugh... didn;t see the punchline coming
     
  6. Seefutlung

    Seefutlung TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2007
    Messages:
    1,558
    Likes Received:
    62
    Location:
    SoCal
    Can others edit my Photos:
    Photos OK to edit
    oh yes... LOL
     
  7. Sarah23

    Sarah23 TPF Noob!

    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2008
    Messages:
    716
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oklahoma
    Can others edit my Photos:
    Photos NOT OK to edit
    LOL!!
     

Share This Page