Hell

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Mitica100, Nov 18, 2004.

  1. Mitica100

    Mitica100 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

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    The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of
    Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
    cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

    One student, however, wrote the following:

    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

    As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
    Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that
    if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there
    is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

    With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

    This gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
    Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
    breaks loose.

    2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
    Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is it?

    If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
    extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine
    being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


    THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
     
  2. John E.

    John E. TPF Noob!

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    :lmao: That is way too funny, best laugh in ages.
     
  3. Nytmair

    Nytmair TPF Noob!

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    :LOL: that last paragraph is great haha
     
  4. aggiezach

    aggiezach Yup...

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    WOW! That was awesome!


    Zach :D
     
  5. hobbes28

    hobbes28 Incredible Supporting Member

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    If I was only that witty..... Great answer.
     
  6. mrsid99

    mrsid99 TPF Supporters Supporting Member

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    Love that logic...thanks Mitica!
     
  7. ferny

    ferny TPF Noob!

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    That's great! :lol:
     
  8. Vancouver

    Vancouver TPF Noob!

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    :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  9. Luminosity

    Luminosity No longer a newbie, moving up!

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    :LOL: oh too gooooood ........
     
  10. manda

    manda instigator of pottymouthedness

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    :lmao:
     
  11. Canon Fan

    Canon Fan TPF Noob!

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    HA HA HAAAAAAAAAA, wow that was good :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  12. mentos_007

    mentos_007 The Freshmaker!

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    hahaha great... I wish I could write so,mething like that on my history test yesterday :)
     

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