how am i supposed to do this?

Discussion in 'General Shop Talk' started by JimmyJaceyMom, Dec 29, 2007.

  1. JimmyJaceyMom

    JimmyJaceyMom TPF Noob!

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    Ugh!
     
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2010
  2. bellacat

    bellacat TPF Noob!

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    Oh my gosh Kathi I wish I had some useful advice to give you. I sure hope someone here can offer some advice that is helpful. I am sending hugs your way :hugs:
     
  3. Peanuts

    Peanuts TPF Noob!

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    If you decide not to do them you might want to just explain why so she doesn't feel like you just gave her the cold shoulder.

    Although it is impossible to really step into another person's shoes, if I knew every single time someone looked at me they thought of someone who had recently died and avoided me for that reason I would be quite taken aback and probably upset. (Not saying your emotions are uncalled for or anything but.. just from her perspective)

    Perhaps before taking them explain how you are feeling, I am sure she feels that ache just as much and a little chit chat might rid of those feelings.

    (I have no idea if that made any sense... I have been editing for about 6 hours straight so... ignore the word jumble)
     
  4. yardism

    yardism TPF Noob!

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    I would just talk to her before you make a decision. If she is handling it well, which it seems she is, maybe she can help you get through the grieving process. Don't let her wisdom get away from you.
     
  5. Hertz van Rental

    Hertz van Rental TPF Noob!

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    Photography can be excellent therapy - and it sounds like you need it.
    Just take the pictures. If you are concentrating on what you are doing (and try to forget who it is you are photographing) then you should be OK.
    If it gets too emotional for you I'm sure your Aunt will understand.
    Whatever happens it is something that you need to work through so it is always better to meet it head on.
    Nothing is ever as bad as you imagine it will be.
    Besides, if you don't take the pictures then you will be letting your Aunt down - which is the worst thing of all to do. Think of her and not about yourself.
     
  6. Sweetsomedays

    Sweetsomedays TPF Noob!

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    Don't think about how she lost her husband, think about all the wonderful years they had together. Use your emotions to make beautiful photos.

    If you can't do it, do explain why though. Or as someone else mentioned she may feel bad.
     
  7. JimmyJaceyMom

    JimmyJaceyMom TPF Noob!

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    Thanks to everyone who took their time to tell me how you feel. You are all right. I think that my first reaction was to just not want to face it. But the more I thought about it I'm not only flattered that she asked me to do them but I think it's something that SHE needs to do for herself, meaning I can help her through some of it and how cool is it that I can be a part of something that will maybe help her heal.
    I was being a bit selfish but mostly because I'm a very private person, emotionally and otherwise and I hate showing emotion in front of anyone but you're right, she will understand.
    My uncle is the first person to pass away so unexpectedly like that and he was with us my whole life. I took a picture of the sky the day he dies and I still havent' given it to my aunt - because I didn't want to make her cry but I guess it's ok to cry and I have to get used to that idea.
    I think I will give it to her this week.
    Thnaks again guys. :hugs:
     

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