If Jesus was a photographer what brand camera would he use?

Chuck Norris would just glare at the air in his hands and it would sponateously form a photograph of whatever he wanted out of FEAR!
 
Eureka!!! Jesus uses Nikon. That's because his dear ol' dad uses Canon and since everyone knows about rebelious youth, JC wants to use something different, even if it's still not the best camera system ever. DOD is infallible.
 
Canon REBEL... your argument is refuted.

And anyway, I should mention God loved Chryslers.

"And in his FURY, God DROVE Adam and Eve from Eden."
 
I think jesus would be a transformer type machine. When he wants to take a picture, he bends backwards in a crab-walk type pose and his chest opens up to a giant lens that extends out and his eyeballs would then project whatever lighting scheme he wants into the sky, onto the unsuspecting victim, hence the invention of "Jesus Light". Within his torso, he would shoot 11x14 glass plates that he could hand out to all the victims who experience their "epiphany", which is why we have no evidence of their existence today, the plates were just too fragile. It's a shame, the pictures of their reactions would have been hilarious.


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