Mustard

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Corry, May 21, 2005.

  1. Corry

    Corry Flirtacious and Bodacious Supporting Member

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    Joke...kinda gross:

    Love Mustard. (This is a true story. If you have children you will
    probably relate to this father.)

    As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun
    with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard.
    The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in
    our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my wife
    suddenly at my side.

    "Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich," she
    said.

    I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching
    again
    for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.

    I love mustard.

    I had no napkin.

    I licked it off.

    It was not mustard.

    No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have
    sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand, I did
    the sort of routine shoeshine boys do; only I did it on my tongue.

    Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, "Now
    you know why they call that fancy mustard . . "Poupon."
     
  2. Meysha

    Meysha still being picky Vicky

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    :lol: That is so gross. :lol:
     
  3. Hertz van Rental

    Hertz van Rental TPF Noob!

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    Put chillies in their milk and you won't notice the difference.
     
  4. mentos_007

    mentos_007 The Freshmaker!

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    oh noo :) hahahahahaha poor daddy :)
     

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