My attempt @ "ART" C&C please

[Ron Evers]

First off the camera

Then my attempt @ art.

 

[macdsean]

Personally, I would stick with the original image. It is a nice looking photograph. The border around the outside makes it look a little cheesy. But that is just my opinion, others may like it.

I don't know if it is just how it looks on the website or on my monitor, but both pictures appear a little grainy.

 

[Ron Evers]

macdsean, I do not see graininess but I checked what my setting were & I find my ISO was high @ 200 from some previous shots.
P mode
f 4.0
t 1/500

 

[tirediron]

First off, ISO 200 is not high, and as Ron said, I don't see any excessive noise/grain either. With respect to the issue of the actual image, I prefer the original as well. Mainly because the vignette tends to focus the eye on a very bright area.

Looking at the original be very careful of your background; in this case it is over-bright to blown with dark shadows, caused by the fact that there's a very bright light source between directly behind the plant. Solutions for this would be to either use a diffuser between the light and the plant, or change your shooting position, or wait for a more appropriate time of day.

 

[Ron Evers]

tirediron, the objective of the picture was to get the sunlight shining through the berries causing them to "glow". Without the light directly behind they do not glow as you can see with the berries in the perimeter of the picture. In the full size pic you can actually see seeds inside the glowing berries.

 

[nynfortoo]

I like the second one, but I'd brighten up the plants/berries now as they look slightly underexposed.

My eyes don't know where to look in the first pic. It's all too busy and monotonous to me. Your edit tells me exactly where to look, and makes the subject look quite secretive being hidden behind what my eyes now assume is a shaded area of plantation.

My one criticism is that your dark mask is too perfectly eliptical. I'd like to see it uneven so it fits in with the nature and looks like shadow, rather than a frame.

 

[Ron Evers]

Thanks nynfortoo, yes I see it could be brightened a little. I will have to experiment with shaping.

 

[tirediron]

tirediron, the objective of the picture was to get the sunlight shining through the berries causing them to "glow". Without the light directly behind they do not glow as you can see with the berries in the perimeter of the picture. In the full size pic you can actually see seeds inside the glowing berries.

Don't mind that bright flash, that was just the light coming on for me. I understand now. I like the idea; as an alternative, how about a macro of just one or two berries?

 

[Alpha]

There is a huge amount of noise.

 

[andrew99]

For me, I think I would prefer a more subtle vignette effect. This one is so strong it originally made me think you were looking through a telescope or a gun sight!

 

[Ron Evers]

For me, I think I would prefer a more subtle vignette effect. This one is so strong it originally made me think you were looking through a telescope or a gun sight!

I agree. Thanks for your comment.

 

[aramator]

i like the first one the best, i could see what you were trying to accomplish before you mentioned it, great idea!

 

[anderspj]

For me, I think I would prefer a more subtle vignette effect. This one is so strong it originally made me think you were looking through a telescope or a gun sight!

I agree. I like vignette, but not as a sharp circle.

 

[RyanMillerPhoto]

There is a lot of noise, strange it is only ISO200. Anyways, with an image like this, keep in mind the subject of the image. I am no photography expert so this critique is really a relay of what I have attempted to learn.

When taking an image like this, simply ask your self, what is the subject? I see you did attempt to recover with the vignette. But the image was very centered and not "artsy", since this is digital, take lots of pictures most of them off centered! You will see!

 

[Computer_Generated]

I personally like the first one as well. I think Ryan hit on this as I would. If you were going for the glowing berries, how 'bout a closer look at them? Fill the frame with the parts of the subject that interest you. I'm playing the same newbie card as Ryan though, lol.