The Difference Between Liberals, Conservatives and Texans

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by graigdavis, Aug 6, 2004.

  1. graigdavis

    graigdavis TPF Noob!

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    The Difference Between Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
    -----------------------------------------------

    Question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two

    small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes

    around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife,

    and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40 and you are an expert shot. You have

    mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
    --------------------------------------------------------

    Liberal Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man

    look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire

    him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about

    the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out

    of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock
    have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun and
    what kind of message does this send to society and my children? Is it possible
    he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me or would
    he just be content to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on,
    could my family get away while he was stabbing me? This is all so confusing! I
    need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.
    _________________________________________________________

    Conservative Answer:

    BANG!
    _________________________________________________________

    Texan's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click...
    (sounds of reloading).
    Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids think?"
    Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it too..."
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
    Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
     
  2. Corry

    Corry Flirtacious and Bodacious Supporting Member

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    :lol:
     
  3. Chase

    Chase I am now benign! Staff Member Supporting Member

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    :lmao:
     
  4. aggiezach

    aggiezach Yup...

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    :lol: that made me laugh out loud! :D thanks
     
  5. danalec99

    danalec99 TPF Noob!

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    :smileys: :lmao:

    That was awesome!
     
  6. rangefinder

    rangefinder TPF Noob!

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    Love it! Now I'll have to carry a second mag.
     
  7. wolfepakt

    wolfepakt TPF Noob!

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    We TEXANS rock.
    (ok i live in utah now but just a short year and a half ago I liived in dallas fort worth!)
     
  8. carlita

    carlita TPF Noob!

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    leave it to me to be a liberal born and raised in texas. :p

    aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh identity crisis! :shock:

    anyway, this was funny. :p i did indeed laugh at it. i've never fired a gun before in my life though. never held a loaded one. they scare me. :-(
     

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