A Pregnant Wedding Photographer

rachlynn17 · Apr 22, 2009

Well, I'm 21 weeks pregnant, and have ten weddings to shoot from now until the baby is due. I know its going to be a long summer, but I also work with an assistant, so it won't be the worst situation for me to be in.

My situation is... I have a 2nd cousin that is getting married 12 days after my due date. She had contacted me 2 years ago about doing her wedding, and we didn't set up a contract (she wanted to wait until it was closer). Well, now I don't know that I can shoot the wedding. If my baby is late (which my last one was) I'll be getting out of the hospital just a few days before the wedding. And if I end up needing a C-Section, there is no way that I'll be able do a wedding that soon.
I've talked to them, but I haven't given them a definate "NO". The mom just keeps asking me if my due date has changed.
What's your opions? How would you handle the situation?

tirediron · Apr 22, 2009

I'd go with a definite 'No'. Circumstances have changed, and it's unfortunate, but it sounds to me like you more than likely won't be in a position to shoot this wedding, and better they start planning for it now than waiting 'til the last minute.

SpeedTrap · Apr 22, 2009

I would let them know that you can't do it.
There are too many unknown factors. first of all to you want to be out shooting 12 days after your baby is born. Do you want to take the chance of leaving them in the lurch if something goes wrong and they have to scramble to get somenone new with only a few days notice.
They may be a bit upset at first, but I am sure they can understand. I am sure they would be far more upset if you had to cancel with only a few days left.

The professional choice is to decline and offer a few sugestions on other photographers you think would do a great job for them.

suki · Apr 22, 2009

I delivered via c-section and if you've never had one, there is alot more healing time involved, closer to 8-10 weeks than the usual 6 for a "v" delivery.

Two weeks after having my son (who was only 6lbs, 14 oz) i was just barely up to going on short car rides to the store, and even then would get exhausted very quickly and would have to sit in a wheelchair just to finish grocery shopping!

I am in good health/shape and was so through out my pregnancy, but c-sections definitely affect each person differently when it comes to not only healing internally but also your overal physical capabilities. You'll be sore and tender in your abdomen area for a while, even now that he's 6 months old i still get sore spots around my incision and can't lay totally face down on the floor.

either way, I think the wedding is too close and if you're considering having a c-section or your doctor thinks you may need one, then definitely dont do it. My photographer for our wedding had her daughter about 6-8 weeks before our wedding day and was able to keep up with everything, but she didn't deliver via c-sect.

rachlynn17 · Apr 22, 2009

Thanks for opinions! I guess I just needed to affirm that it was okay to turn this wedding down. Right now, I'm not planning on having a c-section, but I've several friends who went through hours of labor only to end up with the surgery. Hopefully, everthing goes normal.

Mike_E · Apr 22, 2009

Tell her that your friends, family and whomever else is having a stroke over the thought and I'm so sorry...

Can you help her find someone else in her budget?

If she was planning/hoping for paying next to nothing how about finding and training a third shooter and directing your assistant along with the new third. (which you can do sitting down)

Besides having a backup assistant is a good thing right?

rachlynn17 · Apr 23, 2009

Mike_E said:
Tell her that your friends, family and whomever else is having a stroke over the thought and I'm so sorry...

Can you help her find someone else in her budget?

If she was planning/hoping for paying next to nothing how about finding and training a third shooter and directing your assistant along with the new third. (which you can do sitting down)

Besides having a backup assistant is a good thing right?

I had thought of this option before. We didn't discuss prices at all, but I assumed they were hoping for the "Close to Free" price range. I could have my assistant & helper step in. Another catch, is that the wedding is over 2 hours away from where we live, and I'd be traveling with a new baby, all of my equipment, and 2 other shooters! (Unless I found someone who lives there to do the "3rd assistant" role.)
That could possibly work.

suki · Apr 23, 2009

neeeewp, i still wouldn't do it, if anything offer her your assistants (for a small fee to cover their expenses/time/etc) while you stay close to home, baby and hospital.

Personally, i think it's too early and risky to travel with an infant that young and also while you're that early into recovery.

mrodgers · Apr 23, 2009

rachlynn17 said:
Thanks for opinions! I guess I just needed to affirm that it was okay to turn this wedding down. Right now, I'm not planning on having a c-section, but I've several friends who went through hours of labor only to end up with the surgery. Hopefully, everthing goes normal.

Yup, not to scare you but my wife was a week late and sent in Monday morning for induced labor. Wednesday morning they took her in for c-section. She was down and out for weeks.

As for the 2nd daughter, she was scheduled for a c-section. We had to go in the night before, but they woke us up and took my wife in for prep at 6:30. At 6:45, I was holding my second daughter. She wasn't as bad with the recovery of that one.

Amazing what you women have to go through. Utmost respect for that from me.