Do I have the right idea about flash?

[Dominantly]

I always underexpose my background by a stop or two, then fill the subject with some flash. I use the Nikon CLS, so I just simply meter the background then let the camera figure out the subject when I recompose. If I like the results I stay, or I adjust it, but more often then not the results are good.
Flash placement and your diffuser also make a big difference.

 

[Dominantly]

i've done both because ive always figured that attachin it to the camera makes it easier in a lot of senses. when i put it in my hand i get even mooorreee confused. i think its a case that i need to read the manual in terms of figurin out all the dials and terms, but really i dont know what im doing at all.

if i put the flash on the hotshoe, couldn't i just click n shoot? Wouldn't it become sort of automatic in that sense?

With the D3000 you lack Commander mode to take advantage of the Wireless Creative Lighting System, BUT you can still use your camera and remote flashes. You can pick up some Cactus V4's and use them to fire a flash remotely, the only drawback being it wont pass on your i-TTL data from the camera.
If you're looking for a good strobe for little cash check out the LumoPro LP160. You could pick up that flash and the wireless triggers for around $200.

 

[KmH]

Many who use a Strobist approach to lighting use the $90 Vivitar 285HV's.

There are many brands of inexpensive radio triggers available today in addition to the Cactus triggers.

Many are available on eBay. I like the iShoot receivers that can mount 2 speedlights: found here