Fat Bride

[Cinka]

*sigh* I'm facing a dilema. I'm currently editing images from a wedding where the portly bride is literally spilling out of her dress. She has flab hanging down and it's unsightly. I knew that if it were me, I'd HATE the pictures, even if they were technically good because no one had to good sense to warn me that my fat was muffin-topping everywhere. I feel bad. I've been slaving over these images, fixing the flab and literally putting her back in her dress - which unfortunately is too tiny. I haven't even gotten to her groom's acne.

Do you guys worry about this? Am I going overboard? My goal is to make her happy and love her images (mind you, while I'm fixing the flab, I'm not making over OVERLY skinny or anything gruesome like that)...problem is, it's just taking forever, but I can't tell her it's because she's so fat.

Do I simply start over and let her deal with it or am I on the right track even though it's taking a long time?

 

[thingsIsee]

I would do the best you can even if it takes a long time. just let them know it will be awhile for thier shots, make up something. priority job came down, or computer crashed somthing nice. she knows she's fat even if she dosen't want to admit it so if you can do enough editing to make her a little less you won't hurt her feelings if it takes a bit of time.

 

[The Shoe]

Did she ask for any of this type of editing? Is she ashamed of who she is?

I'm wondering if you're worrying a bit much, seems like you may be taking the pictures of her at the wedding and are turning them into the her at the wedding you think she should be.

If that makes any sense. If she's happy with who she is, then I wouldn't worry about the fat. If in the future she looks back and is unhappy with her size at the time, and she's changed her apperance than maybe she'll do another shoot with her new body. And maybe you'll be there to take those, too!

Perhaps a way to see how she reacts is to show her a few samples of shots that don't hide her size but are edited to the point of being almost ready for print? If she comments on how fat she looks, there's your sign!

 

[Cinka]

Knowing that the first person we seek out in pictures is ourselves and listening to clients comment in the past, it's something I've started doing - slimming arms, lessening double chins...but this girl takes the cake. It's extra terrible and even my husband said I can't send them as is. I'm afraid she didn't quite realize how bad the dress looked on her and no one told her. I also suspect she doesn't have the best self esteem.

Just wondering what everyone else would do. This is probably the most work I've ever done on a bride.

TheShoe, she's a very pretty girl, it's just that her dress is too tight and she has rolls of fat hanging out the top of her strapless, sweatheart dress, looks pregnant, has gigantic arms, and very thick thighs. Pretty bad.

BTW, I just got a letter complaining about the delay and asking for a refund. Ugh. I've been keeping her updated on the delay, but she's become impatient (rightfully so).

 

[MariClaire]

Knowing that the first person we seek out in pictures is ourselves and listening to clients comment in the past, it's something I've started doing - slimming arms, lessening double chins...but this girl takes the cake. It's extra terrible and even my husband said I can't send them as is. I'm afraid she didn't quite realize how bad the dress looked on her and no one told her. I also suspect she doesn't have the best self esteem.

Just wondering what everyone else would do. This is probably the most work I've ever done on a bride.

TheShoe, she's a very pretty girl, it's just that her dress is too tight and she has rolls of fat hanging out the top of her strapless, sweatheart dress, looks pregnant, has gigantic arms, and very thick thighs. Pretty bad.

BTW, I just got a letter complaining about the delay and asking for a refund. Ugh. I've been keeping her updated on the delay, but she's become impatient (rightfully so).

Honestly, I think what you are doing is wonderful. As a person who could serve to lose a few, I would be thankful to have a photographer like you who puts everything into it for me on my wedding photos which will stick around for a lifetime. :thumbup:

However, if she is starting to grow impatient to the point that she is asking for a refund, I think it may be time to give it up. You might be doing the right thing for her through the editing, but most people don't understand the time and effort that these things require, especially because she does not know you are doing it (and why). I would say at this point it's time to cut your loses, maybe send her an example of an edited and un edited photo..so maybe she understand..and see's what you are doing...and why..without you having to actually say something ????

Good luck with this one!

 

[Canon AE-1]

Oh man! I would show her the originals first and see what she says,
if she complains she is too fat then you could offer to edit them for her.
If you do it anyways and show her, she may take offense to it saying,
you think i'm so fat you felt the need to edit them.
Good luck.

 

[tirediron]

Is there anyone in the bridal party you could contact to quietly discuss the situation and try and get a sense of the bride's view of herself? This would help you decide what feelings might be. I would guess though, as you alluded too, she's a person in denial.

I would suggest contacting her and tell her that the work is taking longer than anticipated (perhaps because "the dress doesn't look right in the photos"), and you want to ensure that she has the very best product, but, "not to worry, as you are not going to charge any more for all of this extra work"

 

[subscuck]

At this point, with her growing impatient and using the "r" word, deliver the images with your normal editing and don't worry about her flab or her husbands acne. Her weight and his complexion aren't your fault or your problem. What you are trying to do is a very decent thing, but unfortunately it's negatively impacting your business now. Deliver the pics with the basic editing you would normally do, and if she complains about her appearance, or her groom's, offer to edit a select number of them gratis. Remember, she bought the dress, she saw herself in a mirror wearing the dress, she knows how she looked in it.

 

[xjoewhitex]

Oh man! I would show her the originals first and see what she says,
if she complains she is too fat then you could offer to edit them for her.
If you do it anyways and show her, she may take offense to it saying,
you think i'm so fat you felt the need to edit them.
Good luck.

Agreed completely. She is who she is, your a wedding photographer she wanted her memory's recorded. I would keep the best photos out of the bunch, its not like your shooting glamour and she needs to look flawless. She could take offense to the editing.

 

[KmH]

There are posing techniques used to make photographs of people so as to minimize their body flaws when the shutter is released.

 

[Sam6644]

better hope she doesn't find this post on google somehow.

 

[burgo]

If she looked like that on the day then I am assuming she has already seen pictures of herself from friends & family pictures. I don't see the dilemma really. If the photos are technically correct, then you can only do so much. Give her the product then she has no claim for a refund. Have you shown her proofs? Does she have an online gallery on your website? These are ways you can prepare her for what her images will ultimately look like.

 

[gsgary]

I wouldn't alter any images, she is what she is you were there to record the wedding as my dad always said "you can't make a silk purse out of a sows ear"

 

[RauschPhotography]

better hope she doesn't find this post on google somehow.

Cannot agree more!

 

[gsgary]

You could put a clause in your contract for Salad Dodgers extra 20% for photoshoping