Three weekly smiles

Mitica100

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Once there was a penguin on his way to Arizona for a holiday. On his way, he noticed that his car had high oil pressure so he stopped to see what the problem was.

On realizing that his car had an oil leak he pulls into the next town to a garage. While it is being fixed he decides to look around the town.

Being a penguin, he decides that a nice cold ice-cream could be good, but not having any hands he gets himself into quite a mess trying to eat it with his little flippers.

When he goes back to the garage to pick up his car, he asks the mechanic "What's the problem?" The mechanic looks up and says "Looks like you blew a seal"

"Oh, no, no," the penguin replies looking embarrassed "That's just ice-cream"

--------------------------

An American tourist went to a restaurant in a Spanish town and asked for the specialty of the house. When the dish arrived, he asked what kind
of meat the pot-pie contained?

The waiter replied, "They are, how you say, testicles of the bull killed in the Rincon today. We call them Cojones."

The tourist found the dish delicious, and after some wine, decided he would come back within 2 days.

On his return, he asked for the same dish. "But these Cojones are much smaller than the ones I had 2 days ago." said the tourist.

"True, Señor, but the bull, he does not always lose."

------------------------------------

Two newlyweds went on their honeymoon and were getting undressed together for the first time.

He took off his shoes and socks and his toes were all twisted and discolored.

"What happened to your feet?" his wife asked.

"I had a childhood disease called tolio."

"Don't you mean polio?"

"No, tolio, it only affects the toes."

He then removed his pants and revealed an awful looking pair of knees.

"What happened to your knees?", she asked.

"Well, I also had kneesles."

"Don't you mean measles?"

"No, kneesles, it only affects the knees."

When he removed his shorts his wife gasped and said, "Don't tell me, you also had smallcox!"
 
Corry, you pulled out all the stop with all three laughing smilies! Oh wait, maybe that's one for each joke.... Wow this is so overwhelming for my mind right now... I think I need to go back to bed! Stupid early classes!!!



Zach :D
 
Why did the Irishman take some condoms with him when he went sea fishing?



He didn't want to catch Moby Dick.....
 

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