An Announcement.

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Avis, Dec 8, 2007.

  1. Avis

    Avis TPF Noob!

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    I have been asked by my client to make the following announcement:

    The artist formerly known as Hertz van Rental shall hereafter be called The Wilson Family And Aunty Doris At 52 Edith Road.
    Under this nom d’Art he will not be dressing up in animal skins of any kind and will certainly not be going to any Museums or Art Galleries. Instead he will be employing gangs of cameramen to roam around documenting all of the places he is not to be seen at.
    The footage will then be edited together into a 56 hour loop and will be screened continuously on one of those cable channels that you can never find until you are somewhat drunk and zapping aimlessly at 2am while deciding whether to go to bed or cook up a curry.
    Then The Wilson Family And Aunty Doris At 52 Edith Road will sit back and wait to become the surprise winner of next year’s Turner Prize.
    He is working on the basis that if it’s out the ordinary and the judges don’t understand it then they are bound to vote for it.
    It’s got to stand a better chance than the one he did this year that didn’t even get a look in.
    It was called Kiss My Art.
    Constructing a life-sized chocolate statue of a young Chinese girl from a latex mould*, he placed it in the middle of his local library and employed teams of resting actors and unemployed Media Studies graduates to kiss and lick the giant confection until it was all worn away.
    It symbolised how the West annexes various non-Western cultures whilst eroding the ethnicity of their peoples .
    Yeah! I thought it was pretentious cr ap too.
    Undeterred, The Wilson Family And Aunty Doris At 52 Edith Road has come back with this block-buster.
    My money is on Spangles, The Juggling Cat.


    * All charges were dropped when he settled out of Court for an unspecified amount.

    PS: If you don’t understand any of this and don’t think it’s funny then you are probably an American. If you do understand it but still don’t think it’s funny then you are probably Mark Wallinger.
     
  2. nealjpage

    nealjpage multi format master in a film geek package

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    Can we just call him the Photographer Formerly Known as Hertz?
     
  3. Antarctican

    Antarctican TPF Noob!

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    Hah, I'll bet the name change is to evade the long arm of the law. He's still under investigation over that chocolate cake matter.
     
  4. nealjpage

    nealjpage multi format master in a film geek package

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    :er: That story left me cold and confused. Who would name a child Mavis?
     
  5. Chris of Arabia

    Chris of Arabia Herding cats since 1988... Supporting Member

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    There's a distinct whiff of collusion about all this, I just wish I could work out where it's coming from... wonder if The Wilson Family are related to our managing director?
     
  6. Antarctican

    Antarctican TPF Noob!

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    ^^^^ Nah, I think the 'whiff' you're referring to is just Avis' fingers (as per his avatar)
     
  7. ferny

    ferny TPF Noob!

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    I wasn't aware I was American.
     
  8. dpolston

    dpolston TPF Noob!

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    I think we need to change his name to a symbol.
     
  9. JohnMF

    JohnMF TPF Noob!

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    no bear suits at The Wilson Family And Aunty Doris At 52 Edith Road then?
     
  10. Avis

    Avis TPF Noob!

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    I understand that they have four skins but never go 'bear'.
    Wrong size, probably.

    An update:
    The Wilson Family And Aunty Doris At 52 Edith Road was recently not seen in a gent's public convenience and did not sign a urinal. Nor did he remove it.
    Just as well. I'm sure people would have noticed. And the last thing you want in a gent's is for people to miss the porcelain.
     
  11. LaFoto

    LaFoto Just Corinna in real life Staff Member Supporting Member

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    I understand it the first bit of footage is in the can? Wow, that is going to be a thrilling part of the 56-hour movie!!!
     
  12. Antarctican

    Antarctican TPF Noob!

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    So he's re-creating Duchamp's Fountain as part of the movie? Or he just wanted it nearby for the 'convenience'?

    Will a Tracey Emin homage be next?

    Edit: Love the pun in Corinna's post (giggle)
     

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