Been in hospital lately?

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by hovis, Jul 4, 2008.

  1. hovis

    hovis TPF Noob!

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    Hospital chart bloopers - actual writings from hospital charts!

    1. The patient refused autopsy.

    2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

    3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
    4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

    5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

    6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

    7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

    8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

    9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

    10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

    11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

    12. She is numb from her toes down.

    13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

    14. The skin was moist and dry.

    15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

    16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

    17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

    18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

    19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

    20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

    21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

    22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

    23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.

    24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

    25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
     
  2. Alex_B

    Alex_B No longer a newbie, moving up!

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    well, sounds like from one of the better UK hospitals... :(

    sorry, but I am not really on good terms with the UK health system. I have seen too many people having to wait for too long for a proper medic examining them. I have seen too many people having to wait for surgeries for too long. I have seen diagnosis going totally wrong too often.

    The last victim from among my friends died last week in a UK hospital for said reasons.

    The UK is great in many respects, but I would not want to get seriously sick there ...


    Sorry for the rant.
     
  3. hovis

    hovis TPF Noob!

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    No problem. In many respects, I agree with you.



    But I do know a couple of loverly nurses..........
     
  4. Alex_B

    Alex_B No longer a newbie, moving up!

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    did not want to ruin your thread , mate ;)

    As I said, it is great if not seriously ill ;)
     
  5. hovis

    hovis TPF Noob!

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    It's only a thread on a forum mate - got for it...
     
  6. Senor Hound

    Senor Hound TPF Noob!

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    :confused:
     
  7. Overread

    Overread has a hat around here somewhere Staff Member Supporting Member

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    Sounds comical but this is a serious problem for pureblood geeks - many a time they have to be examined over and over when they go into hospital since many hours spent away from sunlight leaves their skin almost translusent.
    That and examinations have to be done in a darkroom (the sun it burns!)

    :lol:
     
  8. Rhys

    Rhys TPF Noob!

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    I recall a British doctor diagnosing me as having asthma. I was unhappy with the diagnosis and changed doctors. The next one gave the right diagnosis - whooping cough. Most folks I know in the UK have changed doctors several times.
     
  9. Overread

    Overread has a hat around here somewhere Staff Member Supporting Member

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    My brother once broke his collor bone in rugby - so went and sat in AandE for 4 hours waiting to be seen.
    Upon at last being seen the doctors first act was to greet my brother and shake him by the hand - the wrong hand!!!!!


    and yet I would not swap this system for the US one anyday!
     
  10. Rhys

    Rhys TPF Noob!

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    Umm... So you prefer miserably poor quality healthcare that you pay for out of taxes to high quality healthcare that you pay for out of insurance?
     
  11. LaFoto

    LaFoto Just Corinna in real life Staff Member Supporting Member

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    How nice to hear that that would be my only abnormalities then (too). :D

    But hey. After the new scandalous happenings in an American ER waiting room (video proof, too), I'd prefer any ER where you "only" have to wait for 4 to 6 hours to those where you go with an EMERGENCY (!) (after all!!!) and have to sit there for 24 hours (and then die :( ).
     
  12. Overread

    Overread has a hat around here somewhere Staff Member Supporting Member

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    not only that you have to have insurance, but the right insurance for the problem you have ;)
    Some insurance packages will only cover you for so long - say if you need medication - or might not cover certain conditions. Get the wrong problem and you are having to fork out for private.
    So yes I much prefer free pills and medical care even if you have to wait (oh and people have done the whole waiting list and dieing in the UK too)

    Its also really handy if you are not employed at the time
     

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