Cigarettes and Coca-Cola

Discussion in 'Critique Forum Archives' started by ajmall, Sep 7, 2005.

  1. ajmall

    ajmall TPF Noob!

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    [​IMG]

    D70s 15mm Fish-eye
    F2.8 1/30 (Handheld)

    I missed my train by about 3 seconds so I had 30 minutes to kill. The cigarettes were already there but I placed the can myself took some shots, crushed it then took some more. I'm not usually one for "staged" shots but thought I would try something different. I'm looking for general comments of what you make of it. Considering it's the first proper attempt at something like this I am pretty content with it. The only thing that sticks out is perhaps the pillar is a distraction or is it far enough in the background?

    Thanks

    PhotoDrew
     
  2. 'Daniel'

    'Daniel' TPF Noob!

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    I actually conciously didn't notice it till I read what you had said but I hadn't looked at the picture for very long. It didn't hit me at all thoguh (the pillar)

    Nice shot.
     
  3. alexecho

    alexecho TPF Noob!

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    Maybe you could black out above the horizon? Or if the can and cigarettes were slighly closer together you could have shot from a slightly higher anc closer angle and lost the background? It would also have given the fish-eye effect more impact.
    I find the lights slightly destracting rather than the post. Nice idea though. I'm all out of inspiration at the moment, so I'm picking on other peoples shots insead of taking my own! (sorry)
    I do like the use of the ambient lighting and the yellow hue it's given the shot it adds to the feel of the picture.
     
  4. ajmall

    ajmall TPF Noob!

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    Thanks for the feedback. What do you make of this one too (below)? Is it a "better" image? I'm thinking of printing one of the two photos.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. 'Daniel'

    'Daniel' TPF Noob!

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    No I don't think it is at all. The first one is alot better in my opinion.
     
  6. Vmann

    Vmann TPF Noob!

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    I like how close the second one is in the crop but a like the subject matters arrangement in the first.

    Maybe a portrait crop on the first putting the one cigeratte at the bottom and crop out the pillar all togother. This would play the short smashed can against the tall portrait format's negative space/the black sky and lights.

    Just my .02
     
  7. Middlemarch

    Middlemarch TPF Noob!

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    I like the first much better. The second looks like an ad (cept for the butt). And the butt being cut off is distracting. The first has more emotion -- loneliness. I esp. like how the lights in the background are so far away, lending a feel of distance. And I wasn't distracted by the pillar at all.

    MM
     
  8. tirediron

    tirediron Watch the Birdy! Staff Member Supporting Member

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    I prefer the composition in the first by far, but I think it's just a tad too dark. I understand the mood, but IMHO, a bit too much?
     
  9. ajmall

    ajmall TPF Noob!

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    Thanks for the feedback, really helpful. I think I will crop the first and make it portrait, I can see that working quite well.
     

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