Ode to negatives

[JamesD]

And now into the darkroom I go
I shall handle my film quite slow
I don't want it to kink.

Then I'll come out into the light
because my tank seals up light-tight
Or so I think.

Pretty soon, I'll add the chems
Dev and stop and smelly fix
Actually, it's the stop with the stink.

Then I'll hang the films up to dry
120 and 135, by and by
And drain the sink.

Then back into the darkroom I'll go
Still handling film--now negs--quite slow
So I can make prints.

Oh dear, I think I've lost my rhyme
It must be near getting-to-work time
Nudge-wink.

 

[terri]

To sticky this thread.....?
Why yes, I will
For it gives me a laugh
And a laugh is a thrill

Bad poetry, sure -
we all can write
About negatives, film....
....and the lure of red light

We must be crazy
to ignore the digital boom
please don't bore me with pixels
I'm in my darkroom

 

[mysteryscribe]

"We must be crazy
to ignore the digital boom
please don't bore me with pixels
I'm in my darkroom"

ah oh off with her head...

 

[JamesD]

To sticky this thread.....?
Why yes, I will
For it gives me a laugh
And a laugh is a thrill

Bad poetry, sure -
we all can write
About negatives, film....
....and the lure of red light

We must be crazy
to ignore the digital boom
please don't bore me with pixels
I'm in my darkroom

Bravo! Terri, Bravo!
I, too, love the safelight,
Way to go, Terri, Way to Go!

 

[mysteryscribe]

are you sure the red light is for darkroom they have other uses you know.

 

[JamesD]

 

[terri]

They didn't call me "the Queen of Innuendo" around here for nothing, gentlemen.

 

[mysteryscribe]

it's times like this that I miss pattycakes....

 

[JamesD]

Dektol, my lovely Dektol
I'll use you 'til I'm six feet under
And no longer hear rolling thunder

My safelight went out, what is this?
My enlarger turned off, what is that?
Wow, it's raining outside.

So it was thunder, after all...
Where have you gone, O Dektol?
I cannot see you in the dark!

Splish splash, drip drop
I've knocked over a tray, I think
Fumbling in this confounded dark!

Ut oh, ut oh, ut oh; my, my
It shall take forever for my floor to dry
There it is! You've come on, beloved safe light!

I shall post a note, here on darkroom door
"Do not develop when thunder roars
For it is bound to get dark with no power"

Now I must clean up this mess
Good grief, everything got wet
This is going to take me hours.

 

[terri]

:lmao:

:hail:

 

[markc]

my beautiful negative
handled with a white glove
I must show you to the world
so that all will give you love

you are a perfect specimen
fully exposed and conceived
when you are finally printed
I will be so relieved

I pull you from your resting place
ultra-clear 3 mil Melinex
but as I as I bring you to the enlarger
you catch a corner, and flex

time stands still a moment...



then you shutter from my grasp
flutter like a wounded butterfly
as I grope and grasp

I cry as you land on the floor
just as I take a step ahead
my foot slides slowly along
as I hear your emulsion shred

"What have I done?" I cry
and nearly have a seizure
this is no longer a moment
of relaxing calm and leisure

I lift your battered body
and view the damage done
no longer the image of glory
or adoration won

but then in a moment of clarity
realize that I have been blessed
I have a new name for you
I shall call you...
Distressed

 

[JamesD]

Wow, as I read the prior post
Hand covered mouth, face white as a ghost
Scary tale, it seems to be
Doom--DOOM! it seems to me.

Then I see that it all turned out right








ROFL Seriously, though, I was like -gasp- OMG!

 

[terri]

Mark was clumsy in the darkroom, I think. That was hilarious!

 

[markc]

Hehe. Yeah, I was a doof. And lazy. And distracted. And impatient. I'm surprized that I have any self-made silver prints at all. The funny thing is, the ones that turned out the best are still the ones I did in class in high school.
Where are my notes again? Oh, right... I didn't take any.

 

[terri]

Hehe. Yeah, I was a doof. And lazy. And distracted. And impatient. I'm surprized that I have any self-made silver prints at all. The funny thing is, the ones that turned out the best are still the ones I did in class in high school.
Where are my notes again? Oh, right... I didn't take any.

Nutter.