Time for bed

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by lostprophet, Nov 16, 2007.

  1. lostprophet

    lostprophet No longer a newbie, moving up!

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    Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
    The structure of the wall was incorrect
    So he won a grand with Claims Direct.



    It's Raining, It's Pouring.
    Oh sh!t, it's Global Warming.



    Jack and Jill went into town
    To fetch some chips and sweeties.
    He can't keep his heart rate down
    And she's got diabetes.



    Mary had a little skirt
    with splits right up the sides
    and everywhere that Mary went
    the boys could see her thighs.

    Mary had another skirt
    'twas split right up the front
    ...But she didn't wear that one often.



    Mary had a little lamb
    her father shot it dead.
    Now it goes to school with her
    between two chunks of bread.



    Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
    Said Simple Simon to the pie man
    'What have u got there?'
    Said the pie man unto Simon
    Pies you d!ckhead.



    Mary had a little lamb
    it ran into a pylon.
    10,000 volts went up its @rse
    and turned its wool to nylon.



    Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
    kissed the girls and made them cry.
    When the boys came out to play
    he kissed them too cause he was gay.



    Jack and Jill
    went up the hill
    to have a little fun.
    Jill, the dill,
    forgot her pill,
    and now they have a son.



    Jack and Jill
    Went up the hill
    And planned to do some kissing.
    Jack made a pass
    and grabbed her ass
    Now two of his teeth are missing.



    Mary had a little lamb
    Its fleece was white and wispy.
    Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
    And now it's black and crispy.
     
  2. Lisa B

    Lisa B TPF Noob!

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    haha

    mary had a little lamb
    her father shot it dead
    and now it goes to school with her
    between two bits of bread! <---I used to LOVE that one hah
     
  3. LaFoto

    LaFoto Just Corinna in real life Staff Member Supporting Member

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    I'm too simple for the Simple Simon one :( :er: ... don't get it...

    But I do like the one of the skirt split at the front :lol: ... That one rhymes so well, heehee.
     
  4. nossie

    nossie TPF Noob!

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    Oh it does, it really does.
     
  5. ferny

    ferny TPF Noob!

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    Did you know that humpty dumpty was a cannon and that the rhyme isn't too far from the truth?


    Mary had a little lamb, his wool was black as soot.
    And everywhere that Mary went, his sooty foot he'd put.
     
  6. Antarctican

    Antarctican TPF Noob!

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    :clap: Toooo funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  7. momof3girls

    momof3girls TPF Noob!

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    Those are good! :lmao:
     

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