I like the first one, though I would have responded slightly different as a salesman:
Customer: (early 30s male): Hey, do you guys have film here.
Me: Oh sorry, no sir, we stopped carrying film a little while back. We have something much better now. May I show you?
Customer: What do you mean you don’t have film!?
Me: We are more focused on the NEW AND IMPROVED DSLRs and mirrorless, that no longer require you to purchase film. May I show you?
Customer: What? How do you use all these cameras
*Customer does a dramatic motion to all our cameras*
Me: They come with a proprietary process that manufacturers an endless supply of film within the camera. You'll never have to buy film again - Isn't that great? Now if you'll step over here, I'll show you how great these new cameras are. Will you be paying cash, credit or store account?