The Difference Between Liberals, Conservatives and Texans

graigdavis · Aug 6, 2004

The Difference Between Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
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Question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two

small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes

around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife,

and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40 and you are an expert shot. You have

mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
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Liberal Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man

look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire

him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about

the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out

of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock
have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun and
what kind of message does this send to society and my children? Is it possible
he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me or would
he just be content to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on,
could my family get away while he was stabbing me? This is all so confusing! I
need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.
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Conservative Answer:

BANG!
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Texan's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click...
(sounds of reloading).
Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids think?"
Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it too..."
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"