Well, the idea is pretty good, but everything is blocky and square. Try softening all the edges of the portrait and use a font the gives more meaning to the words and even try to shape out a heart with the words. Anyways, just a thought
Nice start. Soften the straight edge along his back. Move them up just a tad in the frame. Use a consistant opacity for the font and change fonts to something more romantic/personal. Reduce the images opacity to about half of what you have here and then play to see what you like. Because of the colour of the paper even try the image in a sepia tone. Good luck and have fun.
