Alone

[andramaxy]

On a vacation with my friend, i get attracted with an abandoned building, decide to take a few shot with my friend in it, what do you think of this, also any feedback about some do and don'ts will really be a big help for me.

 

[timor]

Hi. This type of a picture some people may categorize as conceptual. If you decided to make such a picture, you should know, why you did it, it should be not created by accident. Now, greatness of a picture lays in clearness of the idea for the intended viewer. It might be interesting to know, what inspired you in creating this particular picture. Honestly I don't really catch the idea here, don't know, what symbolizes the great, featureless out of focus area, and also I don't have a clue, how important is the writing on the column for the concept of the picture. That's for the starters.

 

[andramaxy]

actually what makes me want to make this picture is because it is an abandoned building, and make a perfect place for some young teenager to stop by and contemplating about their life, i happen to find another stranger sitting alone in the corner while smoking , but i guess you're right, i haven't put much effort in delivering that messages so it is very unclear to other people, i really appreciate your feedback and will try to applicate it in my further experiments

 

[480sparky]

The humongous, massive, overpowering blur is a huge distraction that adds nothing to the image. The graffiti and the hoodied figure can stand alone. A simple crop is all that's needed.

 

[timor]

will try to applicate it in my further experiments

Good spirit !
In photography seeing is, almost, everything. The old concept of visualization is still very valid today. In your experimentations try rather to see, if you are conveying into picture ideas you've got in field. Aim carefully, frame carefully, see the picture, before you squeeze the trigger. Aim for minimum editing in changing concept into product. Maybe it would be beneficial if you decide, if you are predominantly b&w or colour photographer. Don't dismiss any, but thinking in b&w and colour is different. Also study the masters, Cartier-Bresson, Eugen Smith, Jessica Lange. Photographers of people in their environment. Don't forget other arts, have a look at works of painters, it will help to.
Well, good luck and have fun !

 

[The_Traveler]

read this Why do you photograph what you do? | Photography Forum

 

[Ian63]

I make my words count. this is indeed conceptual. I see.. "alone". But not an isolation of despair. Rather I see a contemplation of a "blank slate" and how to paint it.
I agree however... that the "blank slate" is too dominant. Focusing on the contemplation and less of the grey and undefined area would give the viewer a more defined concept rather than two concepts competing to create only confusion regarding the intent of this concept.
In short... in the frame... 75% building... 25% undefined.

 

[The_Traveler]

I know we should critique only what is presented but the urge to go beyond that and talk about what could have been is irresistable here.

By including only an unidentifable half of the person and lots of an indistinct blur, the viewer is given too little to go on.
Imagine an image where the person, legs, feet and surface are seen and yet there is enough of the 'indistinct blur' to make the point.
The viewer would get much more of a hint, a starting place to build a story on.

 

[timor]

Nice rework, Lew.