Bayhem: A Deconstruction of Michael Bay's Films

[rexbobcat]

movies I made sure not to see:

spiderman 2,3
amazing spiderman 1, 2
captain america 1,2
avengers
thor 1,2
man of steel
transformers 2,3,4
gi joe 1,2
fast and furious 2,3,4,5,6 (future 7)
need for speed

im assuming i didn't miss anything good?

Captain America 2 was actually pretty decent. It was loads better than the first one because, for one, the villain isn't as laughable. And two, it does give good blockbuster action. There were very few moments where I thought, "That's just dumb."

And I really WANT to like the Amazing Spiderman movies, but...I have a special place in my heart for the Sam Raimi films (minus third one). Yeah the new movies might follow the original comics better, but Garfield just doesn't fit how I see Spiderman. He's too...cool. As Peter Parker, he rides a skateboard. I like him as a dorky nerd, not a hip nerd.

Plus, the first Amazing Spiderman had SOOOOOOOOO much teenage melodrama. Half of the movie was him telling his aunt and uncle "You're not my real parents!" and the other half was him going through romantic cliches with Gwen Stacy (They hide in a small broom closet *cough*cliche*cough). Yeah I understand there needs to be a realistic love connection, but I came to the theater to watch a super hero movie, not Marvel's version of Twilight. Plus, the villain just...sucks. I mean - spoilers- his whole plot is to release a gas on the city to turn everyone into lizard mutants? Really? That's the best you've got. At least in Sam Raimi's films Willem Dafoe was convincingly unnerving as The Green Goblin.

It had potential but they dun f*ed it up.

 

[rexbobcat]

Guess I'm the only one who liked man of steel.

I liked it too, but I've never really been a die hard Superman fan, so I don't really know how terrible it is relative to the comics and other adaptations.

I can say that, as a movie, it's a hell of a lot better than Superman Returns (I thought). SR tried to be a campy throwback to older Superman films, but instead it just came off as corny and forgettable.

 

[robbins.photo]

Captain America 2 was actually pretty decent. It was loads better than the first one.

I did think it was better than the first, but the whole Captain America should actually hate America because it's an evil place thing plotline wore out pretty quick with me - the characters were a little more interesting on the whole, the winter soldier thing really didn't do much for me at all though. So is this guy chemically altered? A Cyborg? both? Eh.. after the first few scenes he was in I really found it pretty much impossible to care.

And I really WANT to like the Amazing Spiderman movies, but...I have a special place in my heart for the Sam Raimi films (minus third one). Yeah the new movies might follow the original comics better, but Garfield just doesn't fit how I see Spiderman. He's too...cool. As Peter Parker, he rides a skateboard. I like him as a dorky nerd, not a hip nerd.

I'll go with that - Spiderman was always a favorite as a kid because he wasn't super powerful or super cool or super hip - he was just your average guy who suddenly gets hit with superpowers. He wasn't bullet proof and immune to everything, just a little more agile than your average guy. Something I always appreciated about the character.

Plus, the first one had SOOOOOOOOO much teenage melodrama. Half of the movie was him telling his aunt and uncle "You're not my real parents!" and the other half was him going through romantic cliches with Gwen Stacy(They hide in a small broom closet *cough*cliche*cough).

Yup.. once you get past a certain angst factor I lose interest pretty quick. I mean seriously, suck it up there buttercup. Time to move on.. lol

 

[rexbobcat]

Captain America 2 was actually pretty decent. It was loads better than the first one.

I did think it was better than the first, but the whole Captain America should actually hate America because it's an evil place thing plotline wore out pretty quick with me - the characters were a little more interesting on the whole, the winter soldier thing really didn't do much for me at all though. So is this guy chemically altered? A Cyborg? both? Eh.. after the first few scenes he was in I really found it pretty much impossible to care.

And I really WANT to like the Amazing Spiderman movies, but...I have a special place in my heart for the Sam Raimi films (minus third one). Yeah the new movies might follow the original comics better, but Garfield just doesn't fit how I see Spiderman. He's too...cool. As Peter Parker, he rides a skateboard. I like him as a dorky nerd, not a hip nerd.

I'll go with that - Spiderman was always a favorite as a kid because he wasn't super powerful or super cool or super hip - he was just your average guy who suddenly gets hit with superpowers. He wasn't bullet proof and immune to everything, just a little more agile than your average guy. Something I always appreciated about the character.

Plus, the first one had SOOOOOOOOO much teenage melodrama. Half of the movie was him telling his aunt and uncle "You're not my real parents!" and the other half was him going through romantic cliches with Gwen Stacy(They hide in a small broom closet *cough*cliche*cough).

Yup.. once you get past a certain angst factor I lose interest pretty quick. I mean seriously, suck it up there buttercup. Time to move on.. lol

Part of the reason I didn't like the first Captain America was because it started off as a decent alternate universe period film (sort of) with the kind of brown tones and stuff, and then Red Skull showed up and I was just like, Oh god I can't.

I know he was a major villain in the CA comics, but the transition to the big screen just didn't do much for me. Haha.

 

[Braineack]

Guess I'm the only one who liked man of steel.

I liked it too, but I've never really been a die hard Superman fan, so I don't really know how terrible it is relative to the comics and other adaptations.

i caught a little of it on HBO the other day. I couldn't stop laughing.


I did make the mistake of trying to watch green lantern...

 

[rexbobcat]

Guess I'm the only one who liked man of steel.

I liked it too, but I've never really been a die hard Superman fan, so I don't really know how terrible it is relative to the comics and other adaptations.

i caught a little of it on HBO the other day. I couldn't stop laughing.


I did make the mistake of trying to watch green lantern...

I just like Zack Snyder's hyper-stylized filming I guess.

Do not speak of the abomination that is The Green Lantern. (And it's set up for a sequel as well starring that one villain whose name escapes me)

 

[robbins.photo]

Part of the reason I didn't like the first Captain America was because it started off as a decent alternate universe period film (sort of) with the kind of brown tones and stuff, and then Red Skull showed up and I was just like, Oh god I can't.

I know he was a major villain in the CA comics, but the transition to the big screen just didn't do much for me. Haha.

Ya.. the red skull thing was pretty bad. I know it's a fine line they have to walk, you can't disregard all of the "canon" storyline without ticking off the purists and possibly killing your ticket sales, but I think Captain America is old enough now that they really could have gone a completely different direction with that and been just fine.

Had it been me I might have done the "How did Captain America become Captain America" piece, then fast forwarded to them finding him frozen in the ice and had them just fill in the whole preventing New York from being destroyed during WWII thing with narration/flashback scenes 5 to 10 minutes tops, then picked up the story after they find Captain America frozen and revive him. Tell the story of a guy who grew up in the late 20's, early 30's adjusting to modern day life and facing a new threat of some sort. Think it would have been a much better movie on the whole that way.

I really enjoyed a lot of the character interplay between Natasha and Captain America in the second film.. but wow.. the plotline for me was a total loser. Oh look, guys who have dedicated their lives and sacrificed more than you can possibly imagine because they loved their country that much are really no better than the Nazi's. Typical Hollywood drek. I really wish they'd stop trying to make every movie out there so damn preachy, I pay money to see movies so I can be entertained. not so I can watch a political ad for whatever Hollywood's cause de jour might be at the moment.