"Listen, listen down, down into that sound. What is it? A current of air...vibrating vocal cords...your own eardrums....something running in your head? It's all of these, but go still deeper. This sound is YOU vibrating. And who are you? Don't give me your name address and occupation. You know that's just a mask; a front, a big act. Who puts it on? Your body? Heh, what an act THAT is. And who puts that on? Your father and mother? Did they put you on?
Come off it.
You know very well who you are, but you won't admit it. Deep there in the middle middle of your heart you know it. You've always been around, and always will be. And the "you" in you is the same as the "you" in me. You're not some sort of tourist just visiting in this world for a short time. You belong here, like the apple on the tree. And as the apple is the energy of the tree, you (yes YOU) are the energy of the world.
You don't know who you are do you?
You can't really get at yourself, just as the teeth can't bite themselves and the fingertip can't touch itself. And that's because YOU, the far-in you, is what we call Brahman. The self of the universe. The which than which there is no whicher. The heart and foundation of all that's going on.
You think you're going to die someday. Yes. That's because every now and then, you have to go OFF so that you can know you're ON. You can't have an up without a down, a back without a front, or a light day without a dark night.
The whole thing is pulse.
So what are you doing Brahman?
You're playing on and off with yourself, hide and seek with yourself. You're just passing eternal time with adventure. You forget who you are REALLY. Every now and then, you make like you're just a John Doe, or a Mary Smith, or a butterfly, or a worm, or a star. And that you're lost in the middle of a big big outside world that isn't you, that you don't understand, and that you don't control. Of course! There has to be something else, something OTHER, to bring out the feeling that you are you. And so that you can feel REALLY you, that outside world has to feel really strange, different, weird.
You old trickster.
Deep down in, you know the whole bit. Therefore what you want is a surprise. So you have let things get out of control. You have to feel lost and lonely to know you as you. And you play the thing out by inventing lusts and loves, fears and terrors, gnawing anxieties, and screaming mimi's.
Also you can imagine, "It's not really me, it's IT that runs the show!" But our secret is, as we say, "Taht fa mahsi." YOU are it. YOU are running the show, by not letting your right hand know what your left is doing. By making like there's a whopping great split between what you do and what happens to you. And this is what we call "maya", the great illusion. And "lila", the play, the big act.
And you don't play your game with such simple elements as on and off or black and white or life and death. To seem as real as real can be, this world that you are playing must be so complicated that you can't figure it out. Especially if you're using figures to figure it.
So, between black and white there is the whole range of colors. Between thunder and silence, the whole scale of tones. And between something and nothing...between a smashing fist on the face and trying to touch air, there are all the textures of feeling; burning, throbbing, pushing, hugging, fondling, tickling, kissing, brushing, and light wind on the skin.
Your world is all these elements, of light and sound, of taste, smell, and touch...woven together in many dimensions on the fabulous loom of your brain. YOUR brain; the most complicated thing in the world, which you yourself grew, without even thinking about it.
You have always been around. For you, I, the self is simply what there is and all that there is. All of us are raised from one center, tits on one sow, sounds on one flute. Forever and ever. But it doesn't get monotonous, boring, because we keep forgetting it. We keep the ON's on by putting OFF's between them.
How big is it? And how long is off, and how long on?
Don't take these figures literally, for their purpose is just to give an idea of vastness.
We say that man, human life, is a dance that lasts for 4,320,000 years. And of course there are all sorts of other dances going on at the same time in their own rhythms. Star dances, rock dances, fish dances, insect dances, plant dances, and strange animal scenes like crocodiles dances, elephant dances...
The human dance runs for 4,320,000 years. A span of time that we call a "kalpa". Before it begins and after it ends, there is always another kalpa, or "off" period of rest, during which the self is simply the self, and doesn't pretend to be this "me" or that "you". We call this rest period the "praliah". Peace, uninvolvement, pure bliss."
--Alan Watts from "Om"
To listen to the above with music, click the following:
http://www.djspiral.com/mixes/werd/om.MP3
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