Help! My soon to be wife is uncomfortable with me shooting Nude art

[2WheelPhoto]

Marriage is a wonderful thing...Don't do it.

^^^^^^^^that x infinity

 

[JacaRanda]

Marriage is a wonderful thing...Don't do it.

^^^^^^^^that x infinity

Was not sure if that meant don't do the nudes anymore or don't get married.

 

[The_Traveler]

Ok, Honey, if you are uncomfortable, just come along to all the shoots and be my assistant until you realize that there is nothing 'sexy' about it.

If, after you realize there is nothing sexual or sexy involved, you are still uncomfortable then you have to realize it is your problem and only you can deal with it.

Time to be real about this situation, dear.

 

[ghache]

You are getting married and now have choices to make.

Why are you shooting nudes? especially with starting models who are building portfolios? professionally what this is bringing you exactly? are you getting paid to do it? is it your job or you're having a simple pleasure of shooting young naked girls? it also depends what type of work you are doing...ive seen so many bad work being done from photographer shooting nudes on modelmayhem its unavailable and i sometimes wonder why they do it..

obviously, you asked her to marry you, be ready to give some away, its only the tip of the iceberg because, if shes starting to change her mind like this, you are in for a good trip.

I shoot some pretty hot and sexy model lightly dressed and i shoot boudoir, but never ever my clients get naked and if they ask, i told them that they shouldht shoot something they wouldn't who their mothers lol... this is a line i draw because professionally and personally, shooting nudes just to shoot nudes, for me isn't a priority or something i plan on making a career in.

Here a photographer i follow on 500px that shoot nudes
http://500px.com/artofdan

do you have an online portfolio?

 

[ratssass]

Dear Abby,
I'm confused...

 

[dbvirago]

Sorry, but welcome to married life. She doesn't like your recliner either. You can either
A) Shut up and do what she says, or
2) Argue with her, have a big fight, don't speak to each other for a few days, apologize, then shut up and do what she says

 

[jake337]

Sorry, but welcome to married life. She doesn't like your recliner either. You can either
A) Shut up and do what she says, or
2) Argue with her, have a big fight, don't speak to each other for a few days, apologize, then shut up and do what she says

Or find someone who is comfortable with who you are, and what you do, as a person instead.

 

[The_Traveler]

Marriage should be between adults who recognize their own mistakes and weaknesses and try to protect the spouse from the ramifications of those failings.

If there are no sexual undertones in what you are doing and your spouse she recognizes it is her problem but is helpless for now to do anything, it would be a loving thing to give it up until she is OK,
She should not be badgering you into quitting something you love and she shouldn't even be asking,

In a good relationship, both of you should recognize the situation and choose the course of action that will be the best for the couple - for now.

 

[Mully]

LOL ^^^^^^^^ Maybe in Asia

 

[JacaRanda]

Sorry, but welcome to married life. She doesn't like your recliner either. You can either
A) Shut up and do what she says, or
2) Argue with her, have a big fight, don't speak to each other for a few days, apologize, then shut up and do what she says

Or find someone who is comfortable with who you are, and what you do, as a person instead.

Quadruple Like!

 

[PagesPhotography]

You are getting married and now have choices to make.

Why are you shooting nudes? especially with starting models who are building portfolios? professionally what this is bringing you exactly? are you getting paid to do it? is it your job or you're having a simple pleasure of shooting young naked girls? it also depends what type of work you are doing...ive seen so many bad work being done from photographer shooting nudes on modelmayhem its unavailable and i sometimes wonder why they do it..

obviously, you asked her to marry you, be ready to give some away, its only the tip of the iceberg because, if shes starting to change her mind like this, you are in for a good trip...

i think this is important. But you certainly have a tough choice to make.

 

[Bitter Jeweler]

Yeah.

If you don't mind giving it up...get married . She is more important to you.
if you don't want to give it up...don't get married. It is more important than her, and she will never let you forget it.

If she knew about it beforehand, and didn't have a problem, and NOW it's a problem. RED FLAG!

There are more fish in the ocean. Find one that loves you, and is supportive of what you do, and live happily ever after.

Oh, and, people suck.

 

[gsgary]

Dump her if she is not happy withit

 

[TimGreyPhotography]

Let me ask you a question. If she is so in love with you, then why does she already want to change who your are? This would be a big red flag to me. If you stop taking nudes and marry her, this will only be the beginning. Anything you try to do from there on out will be subject to her "approval". Like many posted above, there are many options to help her become more comfortable with the idea of you taking nudes. Hopefully this is just a little insecurity and you can work with her through it by taking her with you. Maybe let her push the shutter on some nude males that you are taking? One this is for sure, you need to sort this out by talking about it before you tie that knot.

 

[weepete]

Well it's a difficult one, and I sympathise. And your not likley to get a satisfactory answer on an internet forum I think.

Either way I recon you need to have a (or more probably several) conversations on the matter. I don't think its mereley as simple as choosing either one or the other though that is the simple option.

In my view either she's never been ok with it (but wanted you to think she was) and thought she'd get over it or thought she'd be able to change you. She was ok with it, but something has changed during your relationship and that's no longer the case (Sometimes peopled view can change over time) or it was something she could accept with a boyfriend but not with a husband. You are the one who knows your partner best and ultimatley only you can make the call as to what is going to be right for you.

If you are going to talk about it be reasonable, try to understand her concerns and reassure her, this may involve you letting some things go, but with a calm and level head there is no reason why it should degenerate into a shouting match or a big barney. If this is not something you think you can resolve by yourself then perhaps a few sessions with a good couples counsellor might be the way to go.

I used to do a few nudes in paint, pastel and charcoal (a long time ago!), luckily my missus was understanding (did have her concerns mind you) and after a few convos realised that it was all about the form of the model, and there was virtually no difference between me painting a nude or a landscape. However there will allways be people who have a problem with nudes, for whatever reason.

Either way, good luck mate