VI - another question here, and this is more "Technical" I guess.
I understand that the more you open up the aperture the more ambient light you will let it - that makes sense to me; but, why doesn't the shutter time effect the amount of ambient light? Is it because the artificial light source, when it fires, over powers the ambient? Just a little confused as to why length of exposure doesn't matter to this equation.
The length of exposure matters to a point. It's difficult to see in your photos because everything is exposed evenly with all three light sources.
Say you're shooting a person outside right before sunset. The first photo is entirely ambient. 1/125 ss, f/4, ISO 100 for a properly exposed photo with no flash. It'll be a nice flat exposure with the sky starting to darken so it won't be blown out and the person you're photographing will be the right exposure as well. Say you add flash to this and have the flash's power & distance to it properly exposes the subject. Increasing the ss to 1/250 would cause the ambient exposure to drop by one stop. The clouds and background will darken while what is being illuminated by the flash will not, since you did not touch the aperture or ISO, and you'll have a more dramatic photo with a slightly darker surrounding while having a properly lit subject.
Shutter speed controls only the ambient light.
What you're talking about is when you are over powering ambient. Say you were outside in the same conditions shooting at 1/125, f/16, and ISO 100. The exposure would be 4 stops darker than the one at 1/125 and f/4. That should almost effective kill the ambient, so increasing the shutter speed by a tick or decreasing it won't matter too much as all the light for the exposure is coming from the power of the flash.
I hope I made that some what clear. If you have more question, ask. If I can't answer them in a way that you can understand I know some one will be able to.
One question for you. Do you know what a stop is in relation to one f stop or one stop of light?
Another issue that I am trying to work around, and the lack of understanding to my first question might be the reason I can't get this part either, I've been doing other ambient/artificial combinations (just with my sb-800 and a bounce card) and I can't seem to get the ambient to act like I want it to above f/2.8 - is that because the ambient is just too weak? 2.8 is nice for some portraits, but it's hell on my DOF - would a stronger ambient produce different results?
ISO. Don't be afraid to use it. I was comfortable shooting at ISO 1600 on a Canon 30D. If the photo is properly exposed, or even a touch over exposed then brought down in post, noise should not be an issue with most modern DSLRs. Use the ISO to boost the total over all levels.
It's all in relation to a stop of light and how ISO, shutter speed, and aperture work together.
ISO is essentially the sensitivity of the sensor to light. If you're shooting at 1/250ss, f/2.8 and ISO 100, you can bump up your ISO to 800, which is 3 stops of light. That means the the photo that was properly exposed before at f/2.8 will not be 3 stops over exposed. To fix it without adjusting your shutter speed, you can adjust your aperture up 3 stops to f/8 and get the exact same exposure that you had at 1/250, f/2.8, and ISO 100 now at 1/250, f/8, and ISO 800.
ISO also affects the exposure of the flash making it brighter along with ambient, that's why you'd use your aperture in your situation to bring the exposure back down and create a large DOF.