captain-spanky
TPF Noob!
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2003
- Messages
- 751
- Reaction score
- 2
- Location
- in a bubble in Yorkshire, UK
- Website
- www.higg.co.uk
Sometimes I reflect back on all the beer I have consumed. Then I look into
the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes
and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their
dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink
this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
* Jack Handy
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,
that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
* Frank Sinatra
The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.
* William Butler Yeats
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his
fools.
* Ernest Hemingway
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep
your mouth shut.
* Ernest Hemingway
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
* W. C. Fields
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
* Tee Mans
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
* Henny Youngman
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
* Tom Waits
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
* Stephen Wright
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
* Brian O'Rourke
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps
if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at
the very least you need a beer.
* Frank Zappa
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
* Winston Churchill
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
* Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.
Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
* Dave Barry
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
* Humphrey Bogart
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
* Kaiser Wilhelm
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
* Dave Barry
You know you're drunk when you fall off the floor.
* Anonymous
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
* Dean Martin
Remember "I" before "E," except in Budweiser.
* Anonymous
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a support Group.
* Anonymous
:thumbsup:
the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes
and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their
dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink
this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
* Jack Handy
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,
that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
* Frank Sinatra
The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.
* William Butler Yeats
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his
fools.
* Ernest Hemingway
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep
your mouth shut.
* Ernest Hemingway
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
* W. C. Fields
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
* Tee Mans
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
* Henny Youngman
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
* Tom Waits
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
* Stephen Wright
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
* Brian O'Rourke
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps
if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at
the very least you need a beer.
* Frank Zappa
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
* Winston Churchill
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
* Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.
Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
* Dave Barry
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
* Humphrey Bogart
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
* Kaiser Wilhelm
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
* Dave Barry
You know you're drunk when you fall off the floor.
* Anonymous
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
* Dean Martin
Remember "I" before "E," except in Budweiser.
* Anonymous
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a support Group.
* Anonymous
:thumbsup: