Gobsmacked, you gotta watch British TV shows - Monty Python, Fawlty Towers, The Young Ones... then you'd know things like what a biro is. (As Smokey starts looking that one up...) Guess that's why British shows like those used to be on 'educational' TV here, so we could learn about important things like the Ministry of Silly Walks and the fish slapping dance.
Y'all if some dumb... here knocked someone's Mama catywampus, bless their hearts, I doubt they'd have the chance to skedaddle. We tend to take our Mamas pretty serious round here, and anybody who'd hurt someone's Mama is lower than a snake's belly in a wagon rut. You'd have to be so dumb you couldn't find your a.. with both hands in your back pockets to do something so stupid. By the time anyone in eyeshot got done raisin knots on his head, he'd have more lumps than Carter has pills, bless his heart. (As Other Sharon starts googling LOL).