Thinking of Visiting a Roman Catholic Church

[vintagesnaps]

Being protestant whenever I've been to a Catholic service or wedding I didn't know what was going on half the time anyway - but in my experience you don't take communion, you don't use the kneeler, if you're not Catholic. It's been long enough that I can't remember if I stood when everyone stands but I'm thinking probably yes.

See if you notice anyone else there who seems to be sitting but not involved in some aspects of the service and see what they do (if they kneel or sit etc.). I agree, sitting near the back might be a good idea, you could probably see better what's going on and be less noticeable/distracting if you do/don't kneel etc.

I think any church is probably open to visitors and I'd just try to be respectful even if you're there to observe more than participate in the service.

 

[PropilotBW]

You know you can watch Catholic Mass on TV, right?
7:30am mass sometimes lasts 40 minutes....you might want to consider that one (versus the 11am mass, which would have multiple readings and many more hymns lasting over an hour!!!). Oh my gosh, over an hour is borderline the end of the world, lol. Catholics start watching their clocks when it hits 60 minutes...it's time to wrap it up!
Nobody will know you're not Catholic...unless you show up in a suit...then they'll know you're not from around here. Don't overdress or underdress. Khakis and a polo shirt works.

 

[rexbobcat]

You just have to remember that the Catholic Church has A LOT of rituals during their mass: standing, kneeling, interacting with neighbors, interacting with the priest, etc...

It depends on the church,

Also; since you are not Catholic and I assume have not gone through the Catechism of the Catholic Church (the Seven Sacraments, of which communion is the third, I believe), it is customary for you to cross your arms across your chest and be blessed by the priest rather than take communion. You also do not have to make the sign of the cross when entering and leaving the pews, and you do not have to dip your finger tips in the holy water at the entrance. I'm not sure about the kneeling. **

**Um...I just realized you said Roman Catholic lol. I do not know if Roman Catholics have the same traditions as Western Catholics, so you might get a better explanation from someone within that specific church. And churches also vary, so all this may not apply across the board. This info is just something to think about.**

I'm not Catholic but my dad's family is, and it's a big family so I went to sunday school and service quite frequently.

It's an old and interesting religion.

 

[Designer]

kd; you will not get the full effect of the experience by watching it on TV. You have to be there.

BTW: there are certain dates when the services are more ritualized than on ordinary Sundays, so I you really want the full Monte, go on a High Holy Day. Consult your local church's schedule.

 

[limr30 3]

Yes to about everything that has already been said.

Regarding the kneeling and standing - yes, some people will be stricter about such things, but chances are they are going to be in the front of the church, not so much in the back (where, I agree, you should be standing if you want to get a good overview of things.) It also depends on the parish. I grew up in a tame, more conservative type church, but when I went to college, I attended a church that was much more "modern" if you will, and more flexible with all motions we had to go through. For example, the priest would have us all hold hands for the Nicene prayer. Where I grew up, you did NOT touch people in church. I didn't feel comfortable holding the hands of strangers and the whole thing felt forced to me, so I never held anyone's hand and no one made an issue of it.

Now one thing I will add - if you really want to see more of the ritual, mystical core of Catholicism, go to a Latin rites mass. It's fascinating and very different from the post-Vatican II type of mass. I just did a Google search of "Latin rite mass near Denton, TX" and there seem to be a few parishes that still do them. For example: Mater Dei Latin Mass Parish - A parish of the Catholic Diocese of Dallas, served by the Priestly Fraternity of St. Peter

Huh...and several hours after I wrote this, I realized that I never hit "Post Reply"

 

[limr30 3]

**Um...I just realized you said Roman Catholic lol. I do not know if Roman Catholics have the same traditions as Western Catholics, so you might get a better explanation from someone within that specific church. And churches also vary, so all this may not apply across the board. This info is just something to think about.**

Roman Catholic is Western Catholicism. The "Roman" distinguishes the western rites from those of Eastern, Greek, and Russian Orthodox Catholicism.

I grew up Catholic. Never went to Catholic school but did sing in the church choir my first year of college. And I'm from Portuguese Catholic stock. They're not quite as hard-core as the Irish or the Filipinos (what with their ACTUAL CRUCIFIXIONS to "celebrate" Easter), but they get pretty crazy. I've been to Fatima and have seen pilgrims walking on their knees down the street towards the cathedral.

Like others, learning more about the actual doctrine pretty much killed it for me. I now consider myself a Recovering Catholic. I don't go to mass anymore unless it's unavoidable. I suppose I'm technically an agnostic. I still like being in a church building, mostly because it almost immediately triggers a very introspective, meditative state of mind that I find calming. I guess it was all the years and years of Sundays spent at mass - you go through the motions very mindlessly and your mind is free to do whatever it wants. During the period of time when I was involved in the religion, I'd be focused on the rites. When I was bored, my mind would still focus very intently on something rather than wandering all over the place (it was easier to sit still that way; daydreaming made me restless, and that made me fidgety, and THAT got me smacked.) As a child, we went to a church that was built in the style of Native American tribes from the area. Log cabin, Stations of the Cross on drums, Jesus looked kinda like a skinny Sitting Bull...I would study every inch of that church when I was bored, or follow the light of the candles on the ceiling, or challenge myself to only look at the priest's feet for the entire homily. Stuff like that. So I guess I learned how to meditate pretty early in life

I would, however, go see another Latin rites mass. From an intellectual point of view, watching a ritual that is centuries old and putting it into a sociological, historical context is pretty fascinating to me. But I'm also a geek, so...

 

[Designer]

Yes, a very good friend of mine attends an old-fashioned church like that in which Mass is said in Latin. It's been years since I've heard a Mass in Latin.

 

[rexbobcat]

Yes, a very good friend of mine attends an old-fashioned church like that in which Mass is said in Latin. It's been years since I've heard a Mass in Latin.

My dad was an altar boy in school and he would have to get up at around 5 every morning to attend Latin mass. It's kind of weird to imagine, because given the region, many of the religious folk would listen to a language they can't understand every morning in the name of God but loathe Spanish being spoken in the grocery store.

 

[runnah]

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?


Virgin mobile.

 

[waday]

For example, the priest would have us all hold hands for the Nicene prayer. Where I grew up, you did NOT touch people in church. I didn't feel comfortable holding the hands of strangers and the whole thing felt forced to me, so I never held anyone's hand and no one made an issue of it.

Nope. Nope. Nope. Wouldn't do that.

I always hated when everyone said peace and we all shook each other's hands. Especially when the one person that was coughing and sneezing the whole time made it a point to shake their hands with every single person in a 15 foot radius. No, just stay there, wave at people. Don't move. Stay there.

I was all like:

 

[NancyMoranG]

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?


Virgin mobile.

Is my bill payable in Hail Marys??

And Runnah, that will be 2 Our Fathers and 5 Hail Marys for a disrepectful joke.....on your knees boy :/

 

[gsgary]

we do offer free wine (after the wafer/bread/cracker) .... just sayin'

If I had known they had a piss up every week I would have gone years ago

 

[astroNikon]

we do offer free wine (after the wafer/bread/cracker) .... just sayin'

If I had known they had a piss up every week I would have gone years ago

why do you think they're all driving like a BOOH in their cars out of the parking lot after service ?
LOL

 

[unpopular]

we do offer free wine (after the wafer/bread/cracker) .... just sayin'

isn't this against the catholic rules? I thought the free wine was for Catholics only.

As for people being "incredibly offended" if you don't participate, that might be an exaggeration but it would be extremely rude. It's easy to follow along though and people won't be upset if you don't know what you're doing.

But seriously, do not participate in communion. Catholics do not have open communion the way many other Christian faiths do so that would be extremely, extremely disrespectful.

 

[sm4him]

I'm Southern Baptist now, but didn't really attend church at all until I was in my 30s.
Only time I went to church as a kid was when my mom got on a kick and felt like we "should"--and then we just went wherever was closest. Methodist, Presbyterian, Unitarian, Christian Science...anything EXCEPT Baptist.

But, my paternal grandmother was a devout Catholic; dad was an altar boy until he was 12 (when his father died; I'm sure there's a relation there, but he never talked about it).
My grandmother would ONLY go to Latin mass--so when we visited her in NY or NJ, we went to mass. That at least served me well in latter years because I was comfortable attending Catholic weddings and could guide my friends in what to do.
But then the church, by and large, stopped doing services in Latin. So, my grandmother stopped going. Just quit and never looked back, except when someone would ask why she'd left the church, and then she'd say "I didn't leave the church; they left me."

Anyway: Just go. Once you're there, do what seems comfortable to you, whether that is participating in the standing and kneeling, or not. Yeah, personally I do it as an act of respect. BUT:
1. I'm not sure it's any better to be constantly standing, sitting or kneeling a second or two later than everyone else than it is to just stay seated.
2. If anyone were to get offended by your lack of participation, well, it's not like you're there to form a solid relationship with those people anyway. You're just a one-time casual observer. So do whatever makes you comfortable. Within reason--I mean, don't take your shirt off during the service.
3. If you're really concerned about the whole "should I sit or should I stand/kneel?" just get a walker and a knee brace. Then NOBODY will question why you're not standing up or kneeling.