wow tharmsen, that was quite the read.. some people are so ungrateful for the things we do for them.I do favors for friends all the time... with the understanding always being that they will order photos from me.. and they always have.. i don't think I would ever do any kind of wedding (favor or not) without some kind of written agreement so everything is understood.. my first 2 weddings I did were without contracts.. but I have one now..
Well, it's more or less a commentary about the wedding photography business in general.
You're dealing with one of the most emotional events in a persons life. You have the entire family there, and they all have an opinion. Not only that, you're one of the few outsiders at the event and EVERYONE is looking to you for guidance. On my first wedding I was surprised how much depends on the wedding photographer. It's not just about the pictures, the photog is a wedding organizer - shuffling people from place to place, reminding them of obligations, carrying spare accessories for the bride, even getting in the middle of disputes to help resolve them. You have to put on a happy face, be calm cool and collective even though you might be frazzled yourself. They think you're the pro who's been to countless weddings before.
In the middle of all that, if you deliver crap pictures they will eat you alive. It almost immediately goes to threats of legal action. It doesn't matter how friendly and understanding the bride and groom may seem before the event, afterwards things can and often will change - especially if you have to explain why you missed a key shot, or a key shot is poorly lit, out of focus or improperly framed.
You're going to get grilled, and if you're lucky you'll get out of it by offering a refund. Unfortunately that doesn't always cut it because it's not like they can reshoot their wedding. They're going to want damages (depending on your state - this may or may not be an issue).
I've heard horror stories like the one I've linked to above where even though things weren't litigated friendships were lost and family members were disowned over a crappy set of pictures.
As for advice on what to do? If you have to ask, you're no where ready enough for the toughest photography gig out there. I can't tell you how to be in 3 places at once. I can't tell you how to know when to get into position for the ring exchange. I can't tell you where to be at to get those special moments. I can't tell you how to have the right setting at the right time to capture that special moment that just happens in a blink of an eye. In wedding photography you better be DAMN good with a camera. You can't say to the bride while she's walking down the isle "hold it... ok, one more time... just one more... ok, I think I got it, you can go now". You have a split second to get the key shots and you better not be fumbling with your ISO, shutter and aperture settings when that moment arrives.
Oh well, so many people make this mistake... I wish I could say it was funny but often times it's not because it ends in litigation.
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