Ah, that was difficult.

[Kazoo]

I mean, I may seem like I'm overreacting, and maybe that's why I keep bottling things up. I feel like anytime I talk about this stuff, I'm being selfish or something. I don't know.

Don't bottle stuff up - it's gonna manifest itself in some other way. Find someone you can confide in, preferably more than just one. And honestly, if someone tells you you're on a track to depression, don't let it scare you. It's just another way of getting sick, and ya will come out the other side. I've not been through the tragedy you have, but you're absolutely not being selfish if you need to focus on yourself for quite a while to get better.