The composition is not bad (good job not centering them), however I am left with a feeling of wanting to know more. That can be accomplished by either having both of them looking at the camera or as both of their gazes are fixed on something off camera, letting us see a bit more of what is going on might work (might not, depends on what is on the table)
I would much prefer having them looking at the camera as the key to many portraits is getting the eyes in them, and getting them sharp
I agree with the yellow. Also looks a little grainy. I like the composition and mystery but it the focus seems to be on the blue wrist band. It draws my attention right to it.
I'm just a beginner but I think this might fix the color.
I use CS4, so may be different in previous version.
Create a curves layer.
Use the White selection eye dropper tool. If the light tones in the girl's shirt should be white, click them. I tried it for you, here was the result. I'm no pro, so I may be completely wrong.
I dont know. I certainly appreciate the fix and the comments, but that looks way too bright to me and even more yellow. Her arm looks unaturally yellow. Maybe its my monitor. I do however really appreciate your time and effort. Im certainly not trying to bust your balls or anything. I just see it different I guess. Thanks a bunch for your input.