thanks for the comment, it's not straight from the camera, my PPing it. I did that last night and yes today I looked at it and thought this was totally dul. Looking at some fashion photoshoots on youtube and their PP, a lot of them go for this look which is why I wanted to try it. I do like it although I wanted to get more people's opinion as to what they'd change.
I think if you did some retouching on the skin, meaning smoothing it out. Also, on the face it seems OE a bit. Maybe just tone down the harsh light on the skin. If you look at your original. Look at her skin. it seems a lot smoother than the edited one. I bet if you just do that it will make a huge difference. then try the lighting and go from there. I think the dress is pretty good in the edit. I think I get what you are trying for.
Yeah first time doing this, and the model actually gave me the idea since she's into photoshop herself. But her looks much better IMO. I'm learning new things. Hopefully w/ time, I will get better of course.