It's the little things that make me laugh...

Sharkbait

TPF Noob!
Joined
Nov 4, 2003
Messages
2,403
Reaction score
18
Location
Indianapolis, IN
Website
www.whitesharkphoto.com
Okay, brief build-up for this story. We're finishing up the Hobbit in my 8th grade lit class right? Well I've got one student whose parents are religious zealots, and won't allow their kid to read anything that's "not real." So for the past few weeks this kid has been going to the library a couple class periods a week while we discuss the novel.

To fill in for the missing assignments, I had him read a book of his choosing and look for themes and whatnot in his book (same thing we're doing in Hobbit) and turn in regular reports to me.

In his final report, that I'm reading today, was this paragraph (btw, he did his report on one of those books from that religious aventure series about the world after the 2nd coming):

... He realized that he was in easy reach for someone to open the door of the jet and take a clear shat (emphasis added) at him. He sped up again...

LOL, I know this kid doesn't realize that he typoed 'shot' into the past tense of 's**t,' and I'd LOVE to tell him just to see the expression on his little god-fearing face. :lol: I'm not that mean though--I just circled it like any other typo.
 
Yep, you gotta get your grins when you can....too funny, the exact same thought would have crossed through my head, as well! :twisted:

Poor kid, though, to have his school reading material censored. I do hope he picks it up some day so he can enjoy a harmless fantasy story.
 
Ohno, fantasy is right out with this family. It has spiritualism and elements of satanism (the father wrote me a long letter saying that he had researched tolkien and it was clear he was a satanist. I didn't even bother to reply, even though I kind of would have liked to have told him that tolkien was a devout roman catholic. :roll:).
 
oh, my..... seems so severe..... guess he won't be seeing any of LOTR installments with his pals, either!
 
Could be interesting when the poor little kid works out what he's missing and rebels...
 
Good God! Seriously! As a Seminary graduate holding a theology degree I can only say the father is flat out ignorant. Of both Tolkien, the story and Theology. You should have said something to the effect of "Ok then, you are required to read "The Screw Tape Letters" by C. S. Lewis." Then let his dad figure out if Lewis was a satanist. Sheesh. The sheer ignorance of people.
And, oh yeah, btw, he will rebel. Rules with out reason or reasonablity is injustice. And injustice is the incubator of rebels.

ps.s just got back from ROTK. My brain is still in shock. I will not bore you with senseless hyperbole. I haven't the superlatives.

pss. btw, my first exposure to Tolkien despite being an avid sci-fi and fantasy fan was The Hobbit as required reading in college freshman lit. I will forever be grateful to Dr. Campbell.
 
This kid will rebel when he realizes what his dad has taught him contradicts anything that makes sense in the real world. It's just fear based faith that is being taught.

I am no stranger to that scenario. My parents were fairly religious when I was growing up (not as bad now) but they never intervened to say I couldn't read a certain book cause it's evil... like fruits of the devil. They did censor the music I listened to... and I wasn't allowed to date :roll: oh well those are problems for the shrink :p
 
They're whatever religion it is that doesn't allow medical treatment. One of the other teachers said they were jehovah's witnesses, but I think it's more Christian Scientist. Either way, they're wacko. All NINE of their kids are blind as bats and are not allowed to wear glasses (when the nurse told the parents that even sitting in the front row their kids couldn't see the board, the parents said, "We'll pray for good vision, then." :roll:). A couple years ago one of the kids had a seizure over at the high school. As required by law the emts were called; dad threatened to sue for religious descrimination. :roll: :roll:
 
Hi Shark,
Your story would be even more amusing if it wasn't so sad, organized religions have a lot to answer for.
I don't envy you having to tread so carefully with your teaching, good luck and best wishes to you and your profession.
 
Voodoo, your childhood sounds pretty similar to my own. My mother was/is a very religious person and she always pushed her views on my brothers and me. She would try and sensor the music I listened to, the movies I'd watch and the people I would hang out with. Fortunately my father is a pagan, well not really, but he was a Led Zepplin fan so he acted as the voice of reason.

I always found it ridiculous that some people would believe that medical treatment is wrong. Its as if they are turning away there own prayers. The mother prays that her children’s vision will improve and if someone comes along and offers her child glasses she turns them away. Who's to say that God is not working through the person who offers the child the glasses? Anyway this situation reminds me of a a joke I heard a while back (its not funny, but I think its relevant to the medical treament issue.)

One night an old man is sitting in his home watching the evening news while the rain comes poring down outside. The news calls for rain for the next several days and it's expected that the downpours will cause the near by river to flood. As the man goes to sleep that night he prays to God that he will be spared from the flood.

The following day the water starts to rise and there is almost a foot of water in his basement. Knowing that the old man was still at his home a local police officer drives up to the house in a 4x4 and asks the man to come with him to a local shelter until the flood is over. The old man tells the officer that he will remain in his house and continue praying until God saves him from the flood.

The next day the old man wakes up to find his entire living room flooded and a man in a boat yelling at him from outside. The man in the boat asks the old man to grab what he can and jump in the boat with him. The old man simply tells the man in the boat that he will remain in the top floor of his home where it is dry and pray that God will save him from the flood.

The following day that old man wakes up wet in his upstairs bedroom. He decides that he should climb up on his roof where it is still dry. While on his roof a rescue helicopter comes to help the old man, but of course the old man once again tells the rescuers that he will continue to pray to God that he will be saved.

Anyway the flood waters continue to rise and the old man is swept away and drowns. When the old man reaches heaven the first thing he asks God is why he wasn't saved. God just looks down at the man and says, "Well I did send you a truck, a boat, and a helicopter. What were you expecting?"
 
Any bible based religion that forbids medical treatmant is hypocritical. There is a passage in the bible that says something to the effect "if you need medical attention, get it"
 

Most reactions

New Topics

Back
Top