Photography assignment C&C please

[t_hayat]

My photography assignment this week was to take a photograph that told a story. I also happen to be reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison in my English class, so I chose to take a photograph depicting a scene from the book, and this is the result. C&C away!


Scrutiny by t_hayat, on Flickr

 

[t_hayat]

bump

327 views and no replies?

 

[Bitter Jeweler]

Well, if the picture is suposed to tell a story, the story I get is that a girl is watching her brother do laundry.

If you are picturing a scene from a book, and your viewer hasn't read it...well, the story you are trying to convey fails.

A photo that tells a story should do so without words to support it. While many can look at this image and makeup their own stories, I wouldn't call that a success. I believe your assigment is for your picture to tell a self contained story that the viewers should get as intended.

As a side note, don't get caught up in the view count...it includes non member viewers as well.
"There are currently 22 users browsing this thread. (2 members and 20 guests)"

 

[Sammie_Lou]

This is coming from a total noob so take this with a grain of salt...I went to look through your Flikr to see your other images and also saw this one uploaded on April 19th, only that one was in B&W...you can also see on the exif data on this one that it was taken on April 19th. Are you allowed to use photos previously taken for your assignments?? Aside from that, the focus doesn't seem great. It's a little soft. It's also a little dark/pink to me. It looks like your white balance might be off. I noticed that you took this with an ISO of 3200. Any particular reason?? From my understanding, at that ISO, you'll get a lot of noise in the photo...composition-wise, I kind of wish that the girl was facing more to her right so that her face to hair ratio was a little more even or she just had a little more face showing. Also, the back of her head is cut off. If you were going to cut off that much of her head, you could've made it a tighter crop so her hair doesn't look so overwhelming. Sorry if this is a lot or comes off as harsh. I'm just trying to make myself notice as much as possible so I can get better at critiquing my own work.

 

[Bitter Jeweler]

it was taken on April 19th.

Busted.

 

[arne saknussen]

This is kind of difficult to critique, since I don't know the scene you are trying to convey. I would have to look at this as a photo only. For one, you throw focus onto the boy, but he is not in focus. The light on the girl is on the back of her head and not her face. There is something blue just beyond the open door, I think its just the carpet, but the small white object just below the dresser distracts a bit. On the right is a white door which also steals a lot of focus. It also looks like the girl has a toothpick in her mouth, but it looks like it might be a mistake instead of something poignant. Maybe have her touch it with her hand?
However, you did create a story. I am curious as to what is in the bag and why is he holding it high. What is her connection?

I hope that helps. Tell us what happens in class.

 

[arne saknussen]

Or should I say what happened in class?

 

[t_hayat]

Darn, you guys got me. I had originally posted this photo for a C&C on a different forum back when I took it, so when I was posting here, I just copy and pasted the post from the original forum, didn't think anyone would catch me!

 

[youzishushu]

I like this picture.