You've got that mopey artist look down! You seem a bit out of focus. I think i'd like a tighter crop too. The color version of you seems too saturated. And you have a bunkbed???
That caught my attention more than you did, even with the selective colouring. Id agree with a much tighter crop since its a nice thinking pose. Also agree the focus isn't at its best.
How about a vertical crop ... and a bit of upping the highlights then? I prefer the all b&w version, but would do something about it (like I was saying).