I need some advice, because I feel deeply hurt, but I don't know if I'm over-reacting.
One of my closest friends who is also my sister-in-law is having twins. The minute she found out she was pregnant came to me and said I want you to do maternity pics. She showed me endless picture ideas that she found and the one in particular that she wanted was of her in a lake with the sun setting behind her. I was very interested in doing them for her, even looking forward to it. I do all her other photos and photos of her daughter.
Long story short, yesterday i found on facebook that she had had the pictures done by a sister of another friend. She didn't even tell me she was having them done or give me the opportunity to be part of it with her. And she had the other photographer do the one shot in particular (the lake shot) I had told her I was most interested in doing.
I feel deeply hurt by this and I'm not sure I'm justified. I wasn't charging her for them and I don't believe the other girl did either, so it's not a monetary thing. I'm not even sure how to approach her about it.
Of course, you can't help but feel taken aback by this. You talked about, and she came to you with the ideas, it's not like you were bird-dogging her about it. Don't worry about feeling upset or offended - just do what has been suggested here and keep it in perspective. As a photographer, you will have non-family members also being careless with your time/arrangements, and they certainly won't give a crap how you might feel about that. I'm sure you expected better treatment from a family member, though. Whatever. :hug::
I agree with what Sharon suggested - mention that you saw all the shots on FB and tell her you hope she is pleased with the results. Then, let it go. If you comes to you later for more shoots, you might tell her if you're going to plan something you need to know she is serious, since you have other bookings - but keep things light. I agree with tirediron - best to avoid family, too, mixing business and family can lead to hard feelings, and life is too short.