So heres my life...

[MDowdey]

I completely agree with you terri and dew and especially Voodoo. You guys all seem to be very well rounded, midful, introspective people. I value everyones opinions on this board way more than even my own family. Often times it is the person that doesnt know you quite as well that gives the best advice.

Terri,
Its strange you should mention the Floyd. Very crucial in my discoveries. Alot of Floyd, alot of Fight Club, alot of Questioning. Questioning authority, friends, family. Even questioning what i see. Something is waiting for me, its calling me. I can still make an impact.

I am not my father.

thanks guys and girls, you are all my dearest friends.

matt

 

[pucci]

(is that floyd quote from "time" ?) (pink floyd rules, i recently purchased their live in pompeii dvd and it is awesome. mostly stuff from meddle, but a bit from darkside as well. very cool)

yeah, i hear you man. its a pretty heavy subject though, i mean your pretty much trying to figure out life, all of us are. and when you get a little piece figured out, you feel very good. youll see.

like someone said before about being able to like what you see in the mirror, self esteem is a very big part of it. for me, its having cool friends, and being in good shape, and doing things that i love to do like skiing and taking pictures. thats good that you question everything, make sure youve thought something through before you rush to an opinion. and question the opinion of others, you may even agree with it after all, but at least you thought about it.

just try to be happy, keep a good attitude about things, and keep thinking about stuff, i think thinking is key. and keep listening to pink floyd, very cool stuff.

oh yeah, and being lonely is tough too, i was feeling very lonely for awhile, and still kind of am. but i know all my friends love me and i love them, and no matter what i can always talk to them.

so i hope ive helped out a bit, but its hard to describe my feelings on life, so i tried the best i could, and if i come up with any new discoveries, ill be sure to post them here !!

 

[MDowdey]

Thanks pucci!!

I understand your opinon as well. I sometimes have trouble relaying these feelings to others because they misconstrue it for depression. Which, by the way, isnt the case at all!! I just dont want to be a part of this society that makes it mandatory to get a college degree, marry a high school sweetheart, have 2.5 kids in lame ass suburbia somewhere, and a dof named fido. F that, and F anyone who says it will be impossible to make a name for myself doing what i want. Thats why im searching for the key maker. He can show me what I need. where i need to go... only time will tell...

md

 

[pucci]

i just dont want to be a part of this society that makes it mandatory to get a college degree, marry a high school sweetheart, have 2.5 kids in lame ass suburbia somewhere, and a dog named fido

wow, thats exactly the way i feel. all these people are forcing it down my throat that if i dont go to school for so many years and get a title of some sort, then im not "amounting" to anything, or that im not becoming anything. my parents keep telling me to get a trade because ill always have work. i dont want to get a trade, so why would i ?? its all about doing what you want to do. all my friends who just graduated with me are all going to university somewhere and when i ask them what they are going to be, they have no idea !! theyre just blindy taking courses because apparantly, thats what you do after high school. and most of them are just partying and not getting good grades or anything.

its hard to escape, becasue its such a mass mob mentality, its everywhere. and theres so much pressure to make money. i think you just have to ignore the people that piss you off, and be with the people that dont, and do whatever it is that you like doing.

 

[MDowdey]

Im glad that there is someone out there who feels just like me. It makes me feel very insignificant and lonely to have people shoving this idea in my face. thanks pucci, you are a very good e-friend for confirming my belief that my thoughts are valid, just, and(most importantly) my own.



md

 

[pucci]

yeah, its always nice to have someome in the same boat. im happy we could help each other out!

 

[MDowdey]

me too, you rule!!!




md

 

[Geronimo]

MD and pucci,

Let me first start by saying I use to think the say way. Actually there are times that I still feel the say way. However, I understand that now that college is more the just getting a degree. I am not talking about the contacts you make or the life experience either or any of that other crap. It shows you have the ability to learn and study. I still think it is an expensive piece of paper myself still, I do see the need for one as time has gone on. Not because I feel I need it, but to show other people I can do it.

I am not trying to shove these ideas down your head. I use to hate that as well. I am just trying to let you know how I see it, being how I use to feel the same way.

 

[pucci]

i hear what you are saying about showing people that i can do it, because most people do want to see that i can do it. but im not gonna go get a degree just to prove a point. i know i can do it, its just a matter of taking the 4 years. it might even turn out that i find something i really like and i will get a degree, maybe in engineering or something, but until then, im not going to go to school if i dont need to, just to show other people i can. its the people that want to see me do it that i am trying to avoid in the first place.

 

[Thorniest Whisper]

Since we are sharing people? Matt, I really relate to some of what you said.

I am at crossroads in my life, and intersection, with no direction, and in an odd sense, very alone.

I have been a single parent for 14 years and my daughter earned a scholarship for a high school in NC. I am in WI. She is my best friend and the very frame work of my "box." I miss her so much.

I have the same looming sense that something is about to give, break, change, whatever, but I don't know where, how, when, what..and I am a little impatient. I have been doing a tremendous amount of self coaching and a good deal of personal inventory (how I found this forum).

I like the Pink Floyd quote, but I really am relating to Alannis "what I wouldn't give for a soul mate...someone else to catch this drift." I have always been an independent thinker and a little on the fringes, and it has never bothered me, but lately, I am desirous of a more connectedness that most likely has been brought on by the geographical distance between me and my daughter (yet, always a reoccurring under current). As a whole, I am very happy with myself but I feel my potential is under utilized and I am not sure how to correct that.
I have been making a habit of "noticing" things and to be grateful for things I might have been taking for granted.

I have come to one conclusion though, that "Matrix" sense may also be defined as genuine hope. I am embracing it.

I believe talented, intelligent, caring artists; gifted and/or thinking people always struggle a little with a sense of dissatisfaction. Do you think?

 

[MDowdey]

Yeah!!! I agree that the dissatisfaction will always be there. Im such a perfectionist with the things i do that sometimes i dont even attempt them because I know it will suck. Im slowly but surely getting a grip onto something. I just dont want to end up miserable.
To quote from my favorite movie

"Would you rather be working a job you hate to buy S**T you dont need?"
"You are not your F&$#$%$ khakis"

lol i love that one

md

 

[Not Neve]

md, what movie is that quote from?

 

[Geronimo]

md, what movie is that quote from?

Fight Club.

Opps I guess I broke rule #1.

 

[MDowdey]

thats ok geronimo, just remember the second rule...




if i was gonna due anything highly illegal, i would start a fight club. there have been at least ten guys that have said they would if there was one.


md

 

[Thorniest Whisper]

Good Ol Tyler. Everytime you mention the "Fight Club" I miss my daughter more! We love that movie and have viewed it about 50 times. Just one of our favorites. My god daughter made a T-shirt with the quote "I just wanted to destroy something beautiful" on it and people just look at us like we are nuts! Only the members get it.