Thankyou - and goodnight

I do not understand at all what this is all about ... and I do not want to know.

Oh, and I guess I am a sexist ;)
 
As nossie has made public comments about my behaviour I hope that you guys won't mind if I answer them in public. This is getting blown out of all proportion.

...

Yeah thanks Helen :banghead: <<<--It's probably worth pointing out to you that this icon is a metaphor for the frustration that I feel when reading your posts lately.

Which posts? Please list them for me. I am genuinely interested to know which of my posts have caused problems, because I tend to stick to technical matters in my posts. I have no wish to cause trouble, and can't imagine why anybody with that wish would waste their time posting to an internet forum.


I certainly couldn't see someone going to the trouble of getting on his case about it but alas there's always one willing to nit-pick the carp out of things so thanks for correcting me again Helen.

I didn't go to the trouble of getting on his case (who would bother to do that?), I made an effort to understand a joke that seemed very odd to me. Please read the exact words of my PM. The title of the PM, which Lol didn't tell you, was 'An offensive remark maybe?' I read something that on the face of it (my first words in the PM) I thought was likely to cause offence (which is a meaning of 'offensive').

Instead of making a big fuss about it I thought that I would ask the person who wrote it, in private, for insight. I am not familiar with the handbag reference, and on the face of it it appeared to refer to an inconsequential spat between women. Before getting upset about it, I asked. Now, I'm from the North of England, and my language is terse and blunt. Had you noticed? OK, so I've learned from this that I need to keep working at being more sensitive, and to try to avoid ambiguity. After all, this whole thing arose because of ambiguity.

People are a lot more relaxed in the EU about a poke in the ribs and a little tease and make a little extra effort to understand the humour rather than to start wagging the finger at every occasion that could be potentially offensive.
I made the effort to understand the humour by asking Lol in private. I truly wish that people did the same for me when I give them a friendly poke in the ribs and they don't see it that way. Treat others as you wish to be treated yourself. Lol didn't like having his ribs poked, because he was rather swift to take offence and turned it into a big public issue straight away.

It seems you have good photographic experiences to share. I think you're better respected for that.
I have plenty of experience, including a fair bit as a documentary photographer and cinematographer in some horrific and dangerous situations - things that can change your perspective on life. Maybe surviving that makes me rather cavalier and blunt on the internet, because it is comparatively inconsequential. I'm not here to be respected, or popular, by the way. I'm simply trying to answer questions as accurately as I can, and occasionally ask them when I read something I don't get.

Thanks for reading this.

Best wishes,
Helen
 
I'm hoping I'm offering the last word on this one. All seem to have said their piece now and positions appear well established.

After the last couple of days, I'd like to see this quietly fall away off the bottom of the OT page. A little harmony would be nice for a while and I'd like to think that no one is really going to abandon TPF over it. :hug::

Play nice now folks, or someone's going to have to go and stand on the naughty step... ;)
 
I made the effort to understand the humour by asking Lol in private. I truly wish that people did the same for me when I give them a friendly poke in the ribs and they don't see it that way. Treat others as you wish to be treated yourself. Lol didn't like having his ribs poked, because he was rather swift to take offence and turned it into a big public issue straight away.

I have to agree here that written words in emails, PMs or whereever are easily misunderstood. In particular when humour is involved.
 
As nossie has made public comments about my behaviour I hope that you guys won't mind if I answer them in public. This is getting blown out of all proportion.



Which posts? Please list them for me. I am genuinely interested to know which of my posts have caused problems, because I tend to stick to technical matters in my posts. I have no wish to cause trouble, and can't imagine why anybody with that wish would waste their time posting to an internet forum.




I didn't go to the trouble of getting on his case (who would bother to do that?), I made an effort to understand a joke that seemed very odd to me. Please read the exact words of my PM. The title of the PM, which Lol didn't tell you, was 'An offensive remark maybe?' I read something that on the face of it (my first words in the PM) I thought was likely to cause offence (which is a meaning of 'offensive').

Instead of making a big fuss about it I thought that I would ask the person who wrote it, in private, for insight. I am not familiar with the handbag reference, and on the face of it it appeared to refer to an inconsequential spat between women. Before getting upset about it, I asked. Now, I'm from the North of England, and my language is terse and blunt. Had you noticed? OK, so I've learned from this that I need to keep working at being more sensitive, and to try to avoid ambiguity. After all, this whole thing arose because of ambiguity.

I made the effort to understand the humour by asking Lol in private. I truly wish that people did the same for me when I give them a friendly poke in the ribs and they don't see it that way. Treat others as you wish to be treated yourself. Lol didn't like having his ribs poked, because he was rather swift to take offence and turned it into a big public issue straight away.

I have plenty of experience, including a fair bit as a documentary photographer and cinematographer in some horrific and dangerous situations - things that can change your perspective on life. Maybe surviving that makes me rather cavalier and blunt on the internet, because it is comparatively inconsequential. I'm not here to be respected, or popular, by the way. I'm simply trying to answer questions as accurately as I can, and occasionally ask them when I read something I don't get.

Thanks for reading this.

Best wishes,
Helen


I agree with Helen. She did make an effort and PM for clarification. Whats the big deal? She did not make a public spectical of this and now it is. I think PM'ing is a great tool and should be left in private. We all have different sense of humor and if something upsets you about what is said PM. I need to learn this as well instead of publicly venting if something pisses me off.
 
I do wish people would remember that this is the Internet and not real life.
In the scheme of things it all means less than nothing.
Now if you will all just let this silliness drop I can get back to feeling at death's door in peace...
 
I do wish people would remember that this is the Internet and not real life.
In the scheme of things it all means less than nothing.
Now if you will all just let this silliness drop I can get back to feeling at death's door in peace...


What ? This isn't real life? Because in my internet life Im a transexual satan worshiper.. In "real" life.. Buddhist mom of 3... :) with a camera... tee he.
 
I do wish people would remember that this is the Internet and not real life.
In the scheme of things it all means less than nothing.
Now if you will all just let this silliness drop I can get back to feeling at death's door in peace...

So that was you knockin.:lol: Dang it man.. I would have let you in, if you gave me some warning...but ya gotta bring the java.(not the script version..but the stuff ya made in DC):lmao::lmao:
 
well this is an interesting thread... from now on i would appreciate anyone who wishes to get involved with the 'what did you mean by this?' accusations... and the semantics of sexist opinions to pm please... otherwise i will have to lock an otherwise amusing thread :p
 
Especially after a few of your coffee...that'll perk us up...oh...I kill me sometimes. whahahah
 

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