Very well done.
IMO your second shot shows your development very well. I also chime in for a pat on the back for yourself. You did it, you made the changes an you chose to further your photography by taking on the good points, letting go of the ones that were not helpful too. It's a BIG credit to you that you were able to take the critique, filter what it useful and actually take the advice that you need.
IMO the difference in those two shots is palpable. Your second shot is by far the better shot, it is instantly recognisable as better because you've controled the lighting. I can see a deliberate choice of focal length, awareness of background, composition and deliberate choices that you made.
So, yeah....good job!