Thread regarding the future.

[DavidVote]

Some of you may know that I'm a senior in high school -- I graduate in just a few months. While I'm as excited as ever for graduation, I'm also afraid of the moment I graduate. I'm afraid of life after high school. I'm afraid of what life has to offer. I'm afraid on how I'm going to pay for my time in college (planning on at least 4 year college). I'm especially afraid of the wide variety of options and choices I will have to make.

I know this isn't exactly the place to ask, but I wanted to know how did people decide on which college/university they wanted to go to? I've been accepted into all the colleges -- Western Washington Uni, Central Washington Uni, Washington State Uni, Seattle Pacific Uni -- that I've applied to except the University of Washington (which doesn't mail out decision for another 2 months).

I've visited all the campuses for a fair amount of time. The University of Washington is my last choice to be honest even though its one of the best university in the state. I really just want to get out of this city life and experience something new. Western Washington University is too modern, and too much like Seattle, and too urban. Washington State University is also roughly the same.

Central is much different from all the other campuses I've visited. It's located in a more rural area. I love the chill, moody, quietness, and the isolation of the area. I would feel like I would fit right in if I go to Central.

You might be asking, "If you like Central out of all the other colleges you've visited, why are you asking us this question?" A major influence on my bias towards Central is photography. The surrounding area is just so vast, and so beautiful. It's 20 or so minutes away from the mountains. If you go to opposite direction of the mountains, you would get beautiful landscapes of low rolling hills. It would be the perfect environment for me to be in if I want to make progress as a photographer.

I'm thinking about majoring in either computer science or engineering or electrical engineering and Central Washington offers all of those majors, but, most of the other university probably does it better.

But, am I just leaning towards Central Washington University for the area -- more specifically, my photography? Would this really be the best decision in the long run?

I just want to hear the advice and experiences of the older, more mature folks on here that has been through this situation. What advice do you have for someone who is about to graduate high school that is facing a too-many-options dilemma? What advice about life do you have for someone who is afraid of the future? Cause I'm f*cking afraid.

Sorry if this barely made sense. I've never gotten anything higher than a B+ in any English classes.

 

[480sparky]

We really can't make any decisions for you. The best we can do is give you advice.

But I think Doris Day said it best.

 

[limr]

Well. You've got a few things in your favor: you have choices, you have some idea of at least a few things you want to experience, and you are thinking about the decision in a thorough way.

A couple of things:
1) Don't get too bogged down by feeling like you should be in the "best" program. You get out what you put in, and if you are committed to getting a good education in your field, then you can do that even if it's not the top engineering program.

2) You're right to think of not just the program but the actual living conditions. If you go to a school simply because of the academic program you think you'll major in, it could bite you in the ass. You might be in a good program but if you hate everything else about the living conditions, then you won't get a lot out of said program. Also, you might start the program only to find that you hate that too and want to switch majors. Then what options do you have? Look for a well-rounded set of offerings, not only at the ranking of the program you are thinking about at the moment.

3) You are ready to experience a new type of environment, and you have a purpose for wanting to be in a quieter, more rural setting. Don't dismiss that, but also don't dismiss the idea that you might fit in as well or as easily as you hope. When I was making my decision, I was convinced I wanted a very small, rural liberal arts college. Instead, I ended up at the massive University of Florida (don't ask - it's a long story!) BUT, I ended up getting a wonderful education and made life-long friends. As big as a university is, you can still find your little niche and it can feel as small and intimate as you want, while still offering incredible resources that the smaller university can't.

4) Finally, don't be afraid to change your mind. It's a big decision and you do the best you can, but sometimes you get there and react in a way you never anticipated. Maybe it turns out that it's just not the right fit. That's okay! I see this all the time at the community college where I teach. There are students who went to a private school or a bit state school, and they either hated it or were too overwhelmed or the party atmosphere was too distracting...whatever reason, they decided to just leave, take a few classes at community college, and figure it out a bit more slowly. These students often do very well and are then able to make smarter, more informed decisions about what kind of college situation they need.

I know you're scared - I remember the feeling very well. But remember that it's exciting, too. This may be the last time in your life when you get to spend four whole years of your life doing nothing other than learning new things. It's going to be stressful at times, for sure - tests and papers and the pressure to get good grades...these are not small things. It's an intense experience, but if you remember that you can take some time, you can change your mind, you can make mistakes and then make up for those mistakes...it'll be awesome! I'm excited for you

 

[DavidVote]

Well. You've got a few things in your favor: you have choices, you have some idea of at least a few things you want to experience, and you are thinking about the decision in a thorough way.

A couple of things:
1) Don't get too bogged down by feeling like you should be in the "best" program. You get out what you put in, and if you are committed to getting a good education in your field, then you can do that even if it's not the top engineering program.

2) You're right to think of not just the program but the actual living conditions. If you go to a school simply because of the academic program you think you'll major in, it could bite you in the ass. You might be in a good program but if you hate everything else about the living conditions, then you won't get a lot out of said program. Also, you might start the program only to find that you hate that too and want to switch majors. Then what options do you have? Look for a well-rounded set of offerings, not only at the ranking of the program you are thinking about at the moment.

3) You are ready to experience a new type of environment, and you have a purpose for wanting to be in a quieter, more rural setting. Don't dismiss that, but also don't dismiss the idea that you might fit in as well or as easily as you hope. When I was making my decision, I was convinced I wanted a very small, rural liberal arts college. Instead, I ended up at the massive University of Florida (don't ask - it's a long story!) BUT, I ended up getting a wonderful education and made life-long friends. As big as a university is, you can still find your little niche and it can feel as small and intimate as you want, while still offering incredible resources that the smaller university can't.

4) Finally, don't be afraid to change your mind. It's a big decision and you do the best you can, but sometimes you get there and react in a way you never anticipated. Maybe it turns out that it's just not the right fit. That's okay! I see this all the time at the community college where I teach. There are students who went to a private school or a bit state school, and they either hated it or were too overwhelmed or the party atmosphere was too distracting...whatever reason, they decided to just leave, take a few classes at community college, and figure it out a bit more slowly. These students often do very well and are then able to make smarter, more informed decisions about what kind of college situation they need.

I know you're scared - I remember the feeling very well. But remember that it's exciting, too. This may be the last time in your life when you get to spend four whole years of your life doing nothing other than learning new things. It's going to be stressful at times, for sure - tests and papers and the pressure to get good grades...these are not small things. It's an intense experience, but if you remember that you can take some time, you can change your mind, you can make mistakes and then make up for those mistakes...it'll be awesome! I'm excited for you

Thank you for your advice. Lets say I do decide to go to Central. What if I find that I dislike it?

 

[limr]

Thank you for your advice. Lets say I do decide to go to Central. What if I find that I dislike it?

First, I would talk to your parents about what would happen if you tried one school and really didn't like it. How would they react? Would they be disappointed/angry or would they help you find a better fit? Ask them that you just need to know this going in so it will take some of the pressure off.

If you do go to Central and decide you don't like it, first try to identify exactly what you dislike and really consider if it's something you can live with or not. No place is going to be perfect, so there will always be some kind of compromise. If you decide it's something that is a deal-breaker, then think about what your other choices were and figure out which one will fill the need that Central did not. You might want to inquire to the other schools if a deferred admission is possible. For example, let's say you decide after two semesters that you'd rather go to one of the other schools you already got into; would they make you reapply or would your admission still count for a certain period of time?

It's going to be scary no matter what, but go with the school that makes you just as excited as scared. Trust yourself. Even if Central doesn't live up to your expectations, it still might end up being really great in different ways, and if you're excited about being there, you're more likely to have the motivation to work things out.

 

[Designer]

Life is "scary" in many ways. Deal with it. If you find that you've selected the "wrong college", make a change.

As for trying to get into a geographic area for the purposes of photography, don't do that.

I think you should select your college based on the academic features, not the landscape.

 

[sm4him]

Limr has given some great advice.

I'm the mom of two boys in college--one went "away" to college (about 3 hours driving time), the other stayed in town but is living elsewhere while going to school. In each case, their decisions seem to have been right for THEM.

The biggest thing that Limr said I want to emphasize is: Don't stress!! You get to change your mind if necessary! You're not locked in to these decisions for the rest of your life. Not only can you change schools if you don't like the one you choose, you can also change your major.

One thing to consider on the "which school is 'best' for the major" thing. As limr said, you get out what you put in, but also, consider that you may just change your mind anyway. My oldest went to his college choice specifically for aeronautical engineering. He ended up not really liking their program, but he liked the school. Ultimately, he decided not to transfer, but rather to change his major from A.E. to computer science. He then plans to go to grad school for the aero. engineering discipline.
The change cost him, in terms of money and time; he'll graduate about a year after he'd planned, but THAT'S OKAY.

Just don't sweat it. Instead of fearing it, just look at it as the next adventure--embrace it and HAVE FUN! No, I don't mean treat college like a party! I mean recognize that this is a great time in your life--you are exploring, learning, doing things you'll never be able to do again when you're older. Determine that you are going to live your college experience to get the absolute most out of it.

If you get there, and you think you hate it, or it doesn't "fit" you--give it some time. DO NOT transfer after the first semester. Give yourself at least one full year. The first semester will be tough no matter where you are, because it is such a time of change.
As limr said, ask yourself WHAT you don't like, and then ask yourself what you can DO about what you don't like? Join some organizations, meet people, get active and involved, DON'T overload yourself on hard classes that first semester!

And lastly, I'll just tell you this: Everything you are feeling is perfectly normal. And healthy, even. The kids that don't seem to be at all concerned? Those are often the ones that end up shell-shocked.

It's just a new phase of life. And that IS scary. But it can also be wonderful. Don't fear it, embrace it. Charge in and have fun EXPERIENCING life!

 

[NancyMoranG]

Which one can you pay for? I saw a newscast that said the average debt for college grad last year was in the $33,000 range.
That is a game changer for your life.
(Although it sounds like the degree you after will let you pay that off over time.)
Being young is the time you invest in yourself for your future and you do whatever you have to.
Just a different thought than the others.
My .02 worth..
Nancy

 

[gsgary]

I would pick the one with the best looking girls

 

[runnah]

I would pick the one with the best looking girls

Yes. College is a time to get laid, have fun, learn how to network and get a good education.

My pro tips:
Get a degree that actually can get you a good paying job. Hobbies like photography are fun and easy to afford if you don't have an art or philosophy degree.

Do not have a girlfriend during college.

Leave your hometown. Meeting new people and living in a new area is a huge part of life.

Do not have a girlfriend.

Always have one drink less than you think you can have.

Passed out is not an invitation.

Join a club or group with similar interests.

Live off campus as soon as possible.

Treat schoolwork like a job. Take the hour of 8-5 and call those "work hours" focus on school work and do as much as possible then go and have fun.

Enjoy every minute because you'll never have as much freedom or be around as many similarly aged people.

 

[vintagesnaps]

You mean I shouldn't have stayed up late pulling those all nighters?? now you tell me! lol (Of course it wasn't because we were running around the dorm goofing off instead of studying or anything...)

I wanted to go to a Big Ten school where my cousin went and I had gone to visit, but they didn't have the major I wanted. But I had friends who went there so I got to spend weekends there from time to time, got a taste of college life there without actually going to school there! (and now that I think about it, post college life there too). So it seems to have all worked out the way it was meant to be.

Anyway my choices were an in-state university, or another in-state university lol, because that's what was affordable. But that was fine with me, I had no interest in anyplace out of state and liked being within 3-4 hours so it was a reasonable drive home.

I had planned on majoring in journalism and then changed to education after having worked at summer camps etc. So I guess I changed my mind early, by my senior year knew what I wanted to do and was ready to go. I loved college, had a blast, great memories.

What about narrowing down your choices to maybe two or three? then go on another round of campus visits? Maybe you'd see other things next time around that might help you make a decision. Probably you should talk to a counselor or teacher(s) too. See what each college has available for incoming freshman, you might want to take advantage of any programs for first time students to help make your college experience the best it can be.

My nephew just transferred, both schools were within an hour so it wasn't a big deal for him to transfer, didn't seem like he lost credit hours or anything. He was rooming with another kid he knew in school but more of his friends are at the school where he is now and he seems to like it better. Both have comparable programs in his field of study.

Leaning isn't just necessarily those 4-5 years, I've taken post coursework, I don't think that's unusual. If you graduate and start working and find there's something you didn't get in college there might be an option to take a college or an adult continuing ed. course. The year I graduated the state in its infinite wisdom added a couple of courses for our certification and luckily my university had added them my last quarter, but a lot of people were having to take a night class or two.

The drawback to having lived on campus is that I still can't to this day eat chicken parm, but apparently these days dorms actually have edible food instead of chicken patties with wax squares on top. Go where you think you'll be happy.

 

[rexbobcat]

Do what is most financially sound.

There's no point in getting an amazing degree from the best university if you spend the rest of your life paying it off.