What should I do with my life?

moderndayflapper · Jul 10, 2011

I am new here so this might be a little weird cuz know one knows me yet but this is a question I ask myself a lot and I find a lot of people I know ask it as well. I'm actually reading a book called, What Should I do with my Life? by Po Bronson. Anyways, I kind of want to rant to strangers and I also thought I might get some interested thoughts/advice/responses.

Anyways, I recently graduated college with an Interactive Media Design major. Basically it was a melting pot of arts and technology. The school I went to was great, it was an all women's college, empowering and all of that. But I felt I could have gotten a much better education going to a design school. I don't even like design. I'm interested in all kinds of art and I don't like doing the same thing all the time.

Mostly though, I'm into fashion and photography and self-expression. I run a blog and an Etsy shop selling vintage items. Most of the time I'm out taking photos. My passions are clear, why is it so difficult to pin down what I want to do? I don't know what I'm afraid of. I don't know where to start. I want to go back to school. I want to move across the country. To Oregon! I want to be happy and I don't want to be labeled by my occupation, yet it is such a focus to most people.

I was working as a photo assistant in a photo studio but I recently got laid off. I'd like to get a chance to assist professional photographers. I want to start a magazine. I don't know what I want. Sorry if this sounds all over the place, I am feeling that way!

What are you doing with your life? What do you WANT to do?

ladynikon · Jul 10, 2011

Etsy vintage?!?! I love it!! Lol seriously I love etsy I have found several really cool props there.

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time figuring out what you want to do. I say, just enjoy life and its experiences you never know when or if it could be taken form you. Life is super crazy!!! Which is why I personally, love capturing every precious moment! Good luck to you!!!!

moderndayflapper · Jul 10, 2011

Yes, here is my shop:

indie vintage mix of clothing accessories decor gifts by sopasse

I love Etsy too.

That is very true

Bitter Jeweler · Jul 10, 2011

It can be difficult for some to find "the thing".
I knew, once I took a metals class, what I wanted. Now I am living my dream. (on a side note, be careful what you dream :sexywink:

)

You will only be labelled by your occupation while doing your occupation. The rest of the time, you do and be what you want.

Josh66 · Jul 10, 2011

Well, I'm not doing what I want to - and I'm not even sure if I know what that is...

I'm an aircraft mechanic... When I first started, it was new, fresh, and fun. Now (11 or so years later) it's a job...

Aviation is a pretty wish-washy thing to get into in the first place. Some times jobs don't last long, or just suck...

Where I work now, I had to apply for a security clearance - part of the process was to list every address you've lived at for the last 10 years (and someone that knew you there) - I had 24 if memory serves me...
I am currently on my longest stretch in my life (4 years) of having the same address... I have literally never lived anywhere else longer than I have here and now since I was born... Sometimes I just want to pack up and move, because it feels so weird to be in one place for so long...

But ... I go where the money is, and for now - the money is here. One day the whole family will pack up and move - it's inevitable. Where? Who knows... If I had to move right now, I would say west. Arizona or New Mexico maybe... Or back to the east coast... (Florida or Georgia, probably.)

Anyway... When you're young and single - it's easy. I never thought twice about packing up and doing a cross country move. Hell, I didn't even care if I had a job waiting for me. If I got bored of some place, I just left.

Now that I have a wife & kids, there's more to consider - but it's still going to happen eventually...

I say - do whatever you want until you decide it's time to settle down. Once you have 'responsibilities', it gets harder to just pick up and move.

moderndayflapper · Jul 10, 2011

Anyway... When you're young and single - it's easy. I never thought twice about packing up and doing a cross country move. Hell, I didn't even care if I had a job waiting for me. If I got bored of some place, I just left.

I like that. I want to move. I am bored of this place!

Josh66 · Jul 10, 2011

It can be rough (just moving with no real plans) - but if all you have to look out for is yourself, it's doable.

No matter what, I was always able to take care of myself. You might have to lower your standards a little - live in a small apartment, eat ramen noodles, work some bull**** job - but it's doable. And that stuff is just temporary anyway - till you get on your feet.

Not everyone can do it, but having done it - I think it made me a stronger person. I know that no matter what - it will be alright. It might suck for a while, but it will get better.

moderndayflapper · Jul 10, 2011

That's why I want to do it! I feel like everywhere I have lived hasn't been my own choice. I want to go somewhere that I want to go and just be on my own. I've always had a safety net no matter what. I've been dreaming about it and thinking about it seriously lately too

Kerbouchard · Jul 10, 2011

Heck, I'm the Chief Engineer for a Fortune 50 company and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

den9 · Jul 10, 2011

do it while you are young, you can always move back

ladynikon · Jul 10, 2011

Do what inspires you! Inspiration is a powerful thing.

Josh66 · Jul 10, 2011

moderndayflapper said:
I've always had a safety net no matter what.

That was the hardest part for me - leaving the safety net. To be truly on your own - 1000 miles from anyone you know.

Now that I've done it, I feel like anything is possible. No matter what, I can find a way to make it happen. When I first left 'the nest', I think that was the most freedom I've felt. Like, I'm 100% on my own - there is nobody to come help me, nobody to call - it's just you. You either make it happen or you make a collect call begging for help. :lol:

Once you've been through that, you can do anything. ...That's how I feel anyway. I know that at any time, I can move to where ever I want to, and I'm lucky enough to have a wife that will follow me. I don't really 'like' where I live now, but the money is just too good to leave - for now. Eventually, the job market will pick up and there will be a better job somewhere else, or I will just get so bored of this place that I have to leave... (Money isn't everything.)

Now that I have a family to look after, it's like the safety net is re-born - but it's not for me, it's for them - and now I'm the one holding it. I have to make sure that whatever I do, the family is taken care of. It makes it harder, but I still know that I can do it when the time comes. It might suck for a year or two, but eventually - things will 'normalize'.

When I moved to Texas, I didn't have a job or a place to live... I was bored of where I was living (Delaware), so I just quit my (good) job, packed my **** into my jeep, and drove to Texas (everyone thought I was crazy - quitting a good job with nowhere to live and no job prospects). I went a month before I found a job, spent most of my savings in the mean time - and then I got a job and the rest is history. Call it a 'coming of age', I guess... I don't want to do that again, now that I have a family to support - but I know that I can when I have to.

ladynikon · Jul 10, 2011

O|||||||O said:
That was the hardest part for me - leaving the safety net. To be truly on your own - 1000 miles from anyone you know.

Now that I've done it, I feel like anything is possible. No matter what, I can find a way to make it happen. When I first left 'the nest', I think that was the most freedom I've felt. Like, I'm 100% on my own - there is nobody to come help me, nobody to call - it's just you. You either make it happen or you make a collect call begging for help. Once you've been through that, you can do anything. ...That's how I feel anyway. I know that at any time, I can move to where ever I want to, and I'm lucky enough to have a wife that will follow me. I don't really 'like' where I live now, but the money is just too good to leave - for now. Eventually, the job market will pick up and there will be a better job somewhere else, or I will just get so bored of this place that I have to leave... (Money isn't everything.)

Now that I have a family to look after, it's like the safety net is re-born - but it's not for me, it's for them - and now I'm the one holding it. I have to make sure that whatever I do, the family is taken care of. It makes it harder, but I still know that I can do it when the time comes. It might suck for a year or two, but eventually - things will 'normalize'.

When I moved to Texas, I didn't have a job or a place to live... I was bored of where I was living (Delaware), so I just quit my (good) job, packed my **** into my jeep, and drove to Texas (everyone thought I was crazy - quitting a good job with nowhere to live and no job prospects). I went a month before I found a job, spent most of my savings in the mean time - and then I got a job and the rest is history. Call it a 'coming of age', I guess... I don't want to do that again, now that I have a family to support - but I know that I can when I have to.

Very inspirational!!! Love it!!!!

moderndayflapper · Jul 10, 2011

^ I was just going to say the same thing

The thing is, I don't have much savings at all. I have so much stuff too but I want to do it. I just got laid off my job so I'm going to have to sell all my stuff. I'm looking at schools in the area I want to go as well. Thanks for sharing your story!!!!

Josh66 · Jul 10, 2011

RE: selling your stuff....

Unless you have emotional attachments, it has been my experience that it's cheaper (and easier traveling) to sell your stuff and buy new stuff when you get 'there'.

The 'selling of the stuff' also helps fund the move. :lol:

I don't think I would do a cross country move with no savings, but that doesn't mean it's not possible. It would just make you that much more bad ass after you pull it off... :lol:

I paid for hotels till I got a job - you could always just sleep in your car...lol. Yes, it sucks. It's temporary though.

If you decide to do this, one of two things will happen... 1 - you will find a way to make if happen, and be stronger for it. 2 - you will fail and call mom to come pick you up.

If it's #1 - good for you!
If it's #2 - try again next year?

I'm not saying you should do it (because it can be rough, and I don't know you) - but if you do, good luck, and always remember that it will get better (because it will be bad at times...).