Why are there no fast zoom lenses?

[480sparky]

When I really need it, I just set my camera to f/0
View attachment 73421

:mrgreen:

Pfft. I just use lenses with negative f/stops.

 

[astroNikon]

F0? Wouldn't that cause all life as you know it to stop instantaneously and every molecule in your body to explode at the speed of light? Or is that crossing the streams.. I always get those confused.

No. F/0 just stops all life
F/-2.8 makes everything explode. :mrgreen:

f/-2.8 is used to get that perfect shot, where you don't want anyone else to get it .. because it explodes right as you take the photo and no one else can shoot it, except for the exploding bits.

 

[480sparky]

F0? Wouldn't that cause all life as you know it to stop instantaneously and every molecule in your body to explode at the speed of light? Or is that crossing the streams.. I always get those confused.

No. F/0 just stops all life
F/-2.8 makes everything explode. :mrgreen:

f/-2.8 is used to get that perfect shot, where you don't want anyone else to get it .. because it explodes right as you take the photo and no one else can shoot it, except for the exploding bits.

That would explain why, when I shoot at f/-40, the entire universe is immediately converted into a super-massive black hole the size of a pea.

 

[Stevepwns]

Just dont devide by F0..... Its worse than crossing streams, Zull will come back, the gate keeper and the key master will then become our overlords..... please dont devide by F0

 

[astroNikon]

Just dont devide by F0..... Its worse than crossing streams, Zull will come back, the gate keeper and the key master will then become our overlords..... please dont devide by F0

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d8/Stay-puft-marshmallow-man.jpg



That's worst than a Skeeter entering the rabbit hole.
http://www.thephotoforum.com/forum/off-topic-chat/347422-damn-you-mr-rabbit-2.html

 

[robbins.photo]

F0? Wouldn't that cause all life as you know it to stop instantaneously and every molecule in your body to explode at the speed of light? Or is that crossing the streams.. I always get those confused.

No. F/0 just stops all life
F/-2.8 makes everything explode. :mrgreen:

f/-2.8 is used to get that perfect shot, where you don't want anyone else to get it .. because it explodes right as you take the photo and no one else can shoot it, except for the exploding bits.

Huh. So what shutter speed would you use for that? Also, CPL? ND? Lol

 

[robbins.photo]

Just dont devide by F0..... Its worse than crossing streams, Zull will come back, the gate keeper and the key master will then become our overlords..... please dont devide by F0

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d8/Stay-puft-marshmallow-man.jpg



That's worst than a Skeeter entering the rabbit hole.

Ok, I'm ok with hell on earth, apocalyptic nightmare - etc. No problems there. It would a lot like Detroit I'm sure. But taking orders from Sigourney Weaver? Umm.. no. I have to draw a line there.. lol