(uh oh its a wedding thread) PESSIMISTS: Do NOT enter! REALISTS: Please come in! OPTIMISTS: I <3 you

[JustJazzie]

I wasn't originally going to make a thread, because I know how split these things become, but here it goes!

A VERY GOOD friend of a VERY GOOD friend, is getting married in June. I am not exactly sure yet if photography just isn't a priority for them, or if they cant afford a professional. Whatever the reason, from what I understand, its down to me or their local craigslist.

Obviously, weather or not I accept I will need to call the bride and have a conversation with her. I plan to stress the value of hiring a professional and ensure she understands the many limitations that come with trusting me with their photos. However, I am trying to decide if, after this conversation she is still set on forgoing a professional- I should go forth.

Our mutual friend has a crop sensor canon with 2 lens's that I am free to borrow and use as a second body for the day. I know I would really need to invest in some sort of TTL flash, since I am not sure I would be comfortable using my M flash in the fast moving situations of a wedding. I think I would try to talk them into doing bride/groom shots the evening before to ensure we had enough time to work.
Are there other things I should consider when making such a big decision?
Are there any questions I should make sure to ask her BEFORE I decide yes or not? Should I just run away now?

 

[pixmedic]

anyone that looks at your Flickr page can see that you have good understanding of your camera, and a solid grasp on people photography. I say go for it. I am fairly confident you will be fine, and they will be happy with the results.


I probably don't need to go through the whole list of questions , but i will give you a few things we look at before deciding whether or not to do a wedding.

#1, make sure you have a contract
budget
wedding/venue location.
wedding/venue rules and/or requirements.
wedding party size.
bride/groom expectations. IE: what do they want? do they even know what they want?
how long is wedding? reception?
are we covering pre-wedding/post wedding? (calculate total time you will be shooting)
will there be punch and pie (I heard there will be punch and pie)
how do they want the pictures? on disk? prints? albums? all of the above?
options for ordering prints, and method of delivery.
go over time frame for them receiving the pictures and how they will be getting them.
make sure you have a contract.
go over contract with them and make sure everyone understands your/their rights to the pictures.

 

[gsgary]

Go for it as long as you use your Sony and not that crappy new camera you bought

 

[tirediron]

I'm not quite so optimistic as Jason, NOT because I have any doubt about your ability since you clearly know what your limitiatios are, and know what to do about them. I see the actual work as a non-issue, but anytime I see "friend" and "wedding" in the same sentence it makes me nervous. The one question I would ask both myself and maybe others than know the both of you, is: "What will happen to the our friendship if she's totally disapointed in the pictures?" Again, NOT saying your work isn't up to it, but even experienced professionals have clients who for whatever reason, just simply don't like the images they receive. Remember, brides aren't rational people... they say all kinds of things BEFORE the event, but three months later?

On a more technical note, I've not done many weddings (they're just not really my thing), I've never considered doing formals ahead of time. That seems like it would present a LOT of logistical challenges, even if it truly was just the bride & groom (which it almost never is) since the bride would have to dress (is there any of that traditional 'groom can't see the bride before the ceremony' stuff here?), and could all of the relatives be corralled? I like to plan for 2-3 hours (never seem to get more than an hour at most) between ceremony and reception. The bride's dress is still presentable, the wedding party hasn't yet become annoyed at their 'monkey suits' and it's a time when usually not too much is going on.

Pay close attention to Jason's list and no matter HOW good a friend she is, if you do it, get it on paper!!!!!!

 

[tirediron]

Go for it as long as you use your Sony and not thar crappy new camera you bought

Why don't you e-mail her a couple of your Leicas Gary? Then the pictures would be perfect!

 

[gsgary]

Go for it as long as you use your Sony and not thar crappy new camera you bought

Why don't you e-mail her a couple of your Leicas Gary? Then the pictures would be perfect!

She wouldn't know what to do with them

 

[runnah]

Can you second shoot with someone beforehand? Might help just to get a rough outline of how to do things.

 

[tirediron]

Go for it as long as you use your Sony and not thar crappy new camera you bought

Why don't you e-mail her a couple of your Leicas Gary? Then the pictures would be perfect!

She wouldn't know what to do with them

I'm guessing lay them upside your melon!

 

[JustJazzie]

anyone that looks at your Flickr page can see that you have good understanding of your camera, and a solid grasp on people photography. I say go for it. I am fairly confident you will be fine, and they will be happy with the results.


I probably don't need to go through the whole list of questions , but i will give you a few things we look at before deciding whether or not to do a wedding.

#1, make sure you have a contract
budget
wedding/venue location.
wedding/venue rules and/or requirements.
wedding party size.
bride/groom expectations. IE: what do they want? do they even know what they want?
how long is wedding? reception?
are we covering pre-wedding/post wedding? (calculate total time you will be shooting)
will there be punch and pie (I heard there will be punch and pie)
how do they want the pictures? on disk? prints? albums? all of the above?
options for ordering prints, and method of delivery.
go over time frame for them receiving the pictures and how they will be getting them.
make sure you have a contract.
go over contract with them and make sure everyone understands your/their rights to the pictures.

Thank you! Great questions. There WILL be punch, guaranteed to be spiked at this wedding.

Go for it as long as you use your Sony and not that crappy new camera you bought

Glad to see your optimism shining through Gary!

I'm not quite so optimistic as Jason, NOT because I have any doubt about your ability since you clearly know what your limitiatios are, and know what to do about them. I see the actual work as a non-issue, but anytime I see "friend" and "wedding" in the same sentence it makes me nervous. The one question I would ask both myself and maybe others than know the both of you, is: "What will happen to the our friendship if she's totally disapointed in the pictures?" Again, NOT saying your work isn't up to it, but even experienced professionals have clients who for whatever reason, just simply don't like the images they receive. Remember, brides aren't rational people... they say all kinds of things BEFORE the event, but three months later?

On a more technical note, I've not done many weddings (they're just not really my thing), I've never considered doing formals ahead of time. That seems like it would present a LOT of logistical challenges, even if it truly was just the bride & groom (which it almost never is) since the bride would have to dress (is there any of that traditional 'groom can't see the bride before the ceremony' stuff here?), and could all of the relatives be corralled? I like to plan for 2-3 hours (never seem to get more than an hour at most) between ceremony and reception. The bride's dress is still presentable, the wedding party hasn't yet become annoyed at their 'monkey suits' and it's a time when usually not too much is going on.

Pay close attention to Jason's list and no matter HOW good a friend she is, if you do it, get it on paper!!!!!!

Clarification: I have NEVER met the bride. She is a friend of a friend. Our mutual friend had her cousin shoot her wedding and has always regretted the decision, but it didn't strain their relationship. She has also made the bride very aware of her "mistake" so I am assuming the bride either doesn't care, or simply can not afford it. So my relationship would be fine, but should I be concerned for my friends relationship for "referring" me? Perhaps I should discuss that with her first.
As for the formals, I was ONLY referring to the bride and groom shots. Its something I have read on a few wedding blogs, so I thought it was at least worth a shot to ask, especially if the bride is wanting a huge portfolio, that I might not be able to pull off in an hour * shrug* Obviously she may say no way!

 

[JustJazzie]

Can you second shoot with someone beforehand? Might help just to get a rough outline of how to do things.

I have no idea! I might be able to call around and see. I asked to shadow a local photographer once and she said "the last person who she let shadow her, tried to steel her business" but I haven't tried asking a wedding photographer.

PS Runnah- We haven't forgotten about the box! The dishwasher went out so DH had to fix that, and its his work week (14 hour days with commute) I have no idea how to wipe the hard drive myself, he promised to get to it this "weekend"

 

[Designer]

As for the formals, I was ONLY referring to the bride and groom shots. Its something I have read on a few wedding blogs, so I thought it was at least worth a shot to ask, especially if the bride is wanting a huge portfolio, that I might not be able to pull off in an hour * shrug* Obviously she may say no way!

I would forget that idea. I don't know who does this, but I would not even consider it to be somewhat reasonable.

BTW: IMO, you're going to need a helper. Can your friend offer to be your helper? I mean she's already equipped to be the second shooter, so tell her to bring her camera and an extra battery. You need someone to;

Hold something.
Fetch something.
Corral the folks.
Watch your gear when you visit the RR.
Check on the progress of the ceremony.
Run interference for you when you are with the bride's entourage.

 

[JustJazzie]

As for the formals, I was ONLY referring to the bride and groom shots. Its something I have read on a few wedding blogs, so I thought it was at least worth a shot to ask, especially if the bride is wanting a huge portfolio, that I might not be able to pull off in an hour * shrug* Obviously she may say no way!

I would forget that idea. I don't know who does this, but I would not even consider it to be somewhat reasonable.

BTW: IMO, you're going to need a helper. Can your friend offer to be your helper? I mean she's already equipped to be the second shooter, so tell her to bring her camera and an extra battery. You need someone to;

Hold something.
Fetch something.
Corral the folks.
Watch your gear when you visit the RR.
Check on the progress of the ceremony.
Run interference for you when you are with the bride's entourage.

She is in the wedding. But its a small town, everyone grew up together and they have lots of family. I am sure she knows SOMEONE who can be my helper. I did plan to ask if someone would be willing to assist!

 

[pixmedic]

we typically do the formals after the ceremony, but before the reception.
Usually right where the wedding ceremony was done. we set up the camera on a tripod, some lights on stands, and shoot in groups. we decide ahead of time what groups we are going to do and in what order.
full wedding party is almost always first for us.
bride/groom
bride/groom with whoever officiated the ceremony
groom/groomsmen
bride/bridesmaids
bride/parents
bride/groom with flower girl and/or Frodo (ring bearer!)

you get the idea.
depending on how large and diverse the wedding party is, the combinations are endless.

 

[JustJazzie]

Okay, I will nix the pre wedding shoot idea.

The last wedding I attended- the photographer ( who said he had done this for 30+ years) waited until the flowers were DEAD to do the ring shots in them. I was SMH when I saw him do it and thought "maybe he has a vision" Then I saw the album- nope, just rings in half dead flowers. I was so sad for the bride! Not to self- if the flowers are dead- use something else!

 

[JustJazzie]

Do I need a contract if I am not charging?