Arguments in the Challenges - COVID Stress?

[Derrel]

How do you feel about three disagree X's in a row,without one single verbal response? I do not feel that that is appropriate behavior for this forum, or for any other forum. When your post is met with a simple request for a rebuttal, and what you get is nothing but X's, I find that churlish.

 

[Pixeldawg1]

Red X means "disagree". That's it. Shouldn't make you feel too bad. None of us wants a forum where agreement is mandatory.

It is, in my opinion anyway, a snarky way to respond. You most likely would not be happy if I did this with this comment. It should be open for discussion. The OP of that thread, according to the people that I discussed this with, is not really known for playing nice. I also worked as a Mod for the old PopPhoto forums, which were quite popular at that time and I would never call someone out publicly before having a discussion with them privately first. And generally, would not call them out publicly anyway. There is a right way and a wrong way to go about this, and the OP was out of line and rude implying that I was lying. And as I said earlier, one disagreeable person does not a forum make. Block is a better choice if he didn't like my work. EVERY image I posted got called out. And being very honest here, I really don't give a rat's rump about his opinion.

Hmmm. I'm inclined to disagree, and instead suggest that an actual snarky remark is considered snarky, not a red "disagree" x underneath a post. If someone is upset over the way another member is speaking to them, I personally feel that is a valid concern worth addressing. If someone however is upset that another member is using the "disagree" function on their posts, I would be inclined to believe that the person leaving the "disagree" is not the issue, and instead see others reacting poorly to being disagreed with as the much bigger issue.

I have to agree with Zulu; no one should be subject to mandatory agreement. I personally think that finding better ways to handle the fact that someone isn't agreeing with another would be a healthier option for the entire community, rather than removing the function completely. The idea is uncomfortably close to needless artistic censorship, in my opinion.

I think these reasoned responses highlight my own dislike of the Red X functuon ..... I read these posts and thought they both made a good point, but if they'd just responded with a Red X I'd think they were being rude.

In the absence of the usual social signals we get when sitting together as a group, we need to rely on other indicators from the post - and a Red X in isolation is likely to be seen as a 'Red Rag' and create unproductive conflict (unless used as a joke as above anyway)

Imagine you were in a bar with a group of your friends discussing something you are all passionate about, and each time a person makes a point, one member of the group says 'I don't agree' then says nothing more. After the second or third 'I don't agree' you'd be getting pretty irritated, by the forth there'd be a chair smashing brawl.

Stating a contrary opinion for all to consider and respond to is healthy debate, just saying "I don't agree" and no more - is annoying.

Conversely, saying "I agree" after someone makes a point is socially positive and needs no further explanation.

I... agree!

 

[snowbear]

X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X
OK, that's out of my system.

 

[DanOstergren]

Sorry had to do it.

I couldn't help myself either.

 

[DanOstergren]

Red X means "disagree". That's it. Shouldn't make you feel too bad. None of us wants a forum where agreement is mandatory.

It is, in my opinion anyway, a snarky way to respond. You most likely would not be happy if I did this with this comment. It should be open for discussion. The OP of that thread, according to the people that I discussed this with, is not really known for playing nice. I also worked as a Mod for the old PopPhoto forums, which were quite popular at that time and I would never call someone out publicly before having a discussion with them privately first. And generally, would not call them out publicly anyway. There is a right way and a wrong way to go about this, and the OP was out of line and rude implying that I was lying. And as I said earlier, one disagreeable person does not a forum make. Block is a better choice if he didn't like my work. EVERY image I posted got called out. And being very honest here, I really don't give a rat's rump about his opinion.

Hmmm. I'm inclined to disagree, and instead suggest that an actual snarky remark is considered snarky, not a red "disagree" x underneath a post. If someone is upset over the way another member is speaking to them, I personally feel that is a valid concern worth addressing. If someone however is upset that another member is using the "disagree" function on their posts, I would be inclined to believe that the person leaving the "disagree" is not the issue, and instead see others reacting poorly to being disagreed with as the much bigger issue.

I have to agree with Zulu; no one should be subject to mandatory agreement. I personally think that finding better ways to handle the fact that someone isn't agreeing with another would be a healthier option for the entire community, rather than removing the function completely. The idea is uncomfortably close to needless artistic censorship, in my opinion.

I am not saying everyone should have to agree. Far from it. You and Zulu have disagreed here, but no snarky comments or red X's. That's the way to do this and not a Red X and shut the conversation down. It's snarky and childish "take my marbles and go home" mentality.

I'm not saying I like the red x, but I have a much stronger distaste for censorship over the sake of cushioning one's needless sensitivity to someone simply disagreeing with them, because it's just that: someone disagrees.

EDIT
I would also like to point out that everyone is going to interpret that red X differently, and just because one person takes it as snarky or rude doesn't mean it was intended that way or that others interpret it that way, and the function itself is not to blame for someone taking it badly.

 

[Pixeldawg1]

I'm not saying I like the red x, but I have a much stronger distaste for censorship.[/QUOTE]

Dude... I live in CHINA.

 

[DanOstergren]

I would also like to point out that everyone is going to interpret that red X differently, and just because one person takes it as snarky or rude doesn't mean it was intended that way or that others interpret it that way, and the function itself is not to blame for someone taking it badly.

 

[DanOstergren]

Dude... I live in CHINA.

I understand the relevance you're associating in reference to the word censorship, but I'm failing to see it's relevance to the point you're making in this conversation.

 

[Pixeldawg1]

I would also like to point out that everyone is going to interpret that red X differently, and just because one person takes it as snarky or rude doesn't mean it was intended that way or that others interpret it that way, and the function itself is not to blame for someone taking it badly.

And this is a valid point. However, if you KNOW that someone would take "3 red X's without comment" as rude, why would you do it? Then it becomes intentionally rude, and they become the ass hole rather than discussing a point, and no excuse for it. I worked as a journalist for 40 years, and I understand disagreement, and have had to put up with my fair share of rude behavior (Being married to my ex, more than I should have...) as a journalist, almost daily with someone coming up to me and asking about the "fake news" or not liking an article in the paper (which they assume I wrote, even holding a big camera with an even bigger lens... I was mostly a sports photographer...). There has to be a point that you say "this is enough". It becomes less about hurt-butt feelings and more about disrespecting. If you allow people to disrespect you, your business and your call, I choose to not be treated that way though.

 

[Pixeldawg1]

Dude... I live in CHINA.

I understand the relevance you're associating in reference to the word censorship, but I'm failing to see it's relevance to the point you're making in this conversation.

So, you don't think I understand about censorship? Really? You say you don't like censorship. I will guarantee you that I am an expert in this area and don't like it either. Relevant to your comment.

 

[smoke665]

Imagine you were in a bar with a group of your friends discussing something you are all passionate about, and each time a person makes a point, one member of the group says 'I don't agree' then says nothing more. After the second or third 'I don't agree' you'd be getting pretty irritated, by the forth there'd be a chair smashing brawl.

Better yet what if that member held up a sign with a big red X? After about the 3rd time wanna place bets where that sign would be.

Of the forums I am on (some bigger, some smaller) TPF is the only one with the red X, I've never really understood why. Everything about it screams confrontation, from the color red to the x. For those that say it's no different then clicking on agree, IMO it is. I can agree with someone and never create offense, it's a positive comment on the post, but as soon as I hit the red X, I've made a negative commentary on that post. I just said you're wrong threw up a red flag, and challenged you to a duel! Regardless of any contrary idea I might present, I've already told you that your opinion is irrelevant. Human nature being what it is, most won't get past that point. Of those who simply hit the X and never comment, I liken those to the driver that flips you off in traffic..gutless individuals.

 

[Pixeldawg1]

Imagine you were in a bar with a group of your friends discussing something you are all passionate about, and each time a person makes a point, one member of the group says 'I don't agree' then says nothing more. After the second or third 'I don't agree' you'd be getting pretty irritated, by the forth there'd be a chair smashing brawl.

I liken those to the driver that flips you off in traffic..gutless individuals.

Does this include when someone is crossing the road on a green light and someone doesn't yield making a right hand turn and nearly hits someone on a bike??? Asking for a friend...

 

[smoke665]

Does this include when someone is crossing the road on a green light and someone doesn't yield making a right hand turn and nearly hits someone on a bike??? Asking for a friend...

Seriously? You graduated from Bama and you question how to handle that scenario?

 

[Soocom1]

on a diff. forum we use to have the political religious military foru. or PRM.
It was NOT for the faint of heart and quite the rough bunch.
There was ALOT of angery words exchanged and a goodly dose of snarky and condescending statements.

What drove me out was when one mod. came in and started banning people simply because they ( the mod) disagreed with the statements.

The "snowflake" monkier applied directly in that case and became so bad that when individuals were being obviously sarcastic... boom you was done! Three day or five day or perm. vacation.

I frankly couldnt give a flying fergalbarb about who or what you are, I usually say bring it. If you want to spar... tally up.

Ergo....the bloody nose...

But at the end of the day...take it with a grain of salt, pop open a cold one and laugh at the world.

 

[DanOstergren]

I would also like to point out that everyone is going to interpret that red X differently, and just because one person takes it as snarky or rude doesn't mean it was intended that way or that others interpret it that way, and the function itself is not to blame for someone taking it badly.

And this is a valid point. However, if you KNOW that someone would take "3 red X's without comment" as rude, why would you do it? Then it becomes intentionally rude, and they become the ass hole rather than discussing a point, and no excuse for it. I worked as a journalist for 40 years, and I understand disagreement, and have had to put up with my fair share of rude behavior (Being married to my ex, more than I should have...) as a journalist, almost daily with someone coming up to me and asking about the "fake news" or not liking an article in the paper (which they assume I wrote, even holding a big camera with an even bigger lens... I was mostly a sports photographer...). There has to be a point that you say "this is enough". It becomes less about hurt-butt feelings and more about disrespecting. If you allow people to disrespect you, your business and your call, I choose to not be treated that way though.

It's just 3 red X's. That's all. Why does it matter if you think you know they are doing it to be rude to you? It's. Just. A. Red. X. Taking it so offensively really makes one question whether that person really can actually handle someone not agreeing with them on an internet forum when they claim they can.