oh... hm... I need a bit of encouragement ...

[Vtec44]

The question is why are you afraid of showing people your work?

 

[mmaria]

First: Thank you all for saying all of this I'll reply everyone after this post.

Second: let me clarify something, this is not just some local camera club. We don't have a local camera club. This club is located 60 miles from my town and it's called (literally translated) "University photo-cinema club" and the work they display is really good. They host and organize many international exhibitions and competitions.

They don't do meetings, gatherings or photo walks or anything similar.

Most of the members there are 20-30 years older than me and their experience is much longer than that. They display their work all over the world and many of them work as photographers. I'm, on the other hand, someone who's thinking about photography in English because I just speak about photography online and I need time to think how certain setting are said in my own language. I have 0 (zero!) experience in anything that's related to competitions and exhibitions and any photographic related events.

Here's their invite for the exhibition that'll be open on Friday

 

[mmaria]

I think your anxiety is fairly common among newly-created artists. You know you are an artist, but nobody else knows that. The feeling that you have is like trying to imagine going naked in public. Right now you are insecure, but after you realize that everybody else is naked too, then you begin to relax.

Well your analogy of being naked where everyone is also naked made me smile.
The difference is that they're comfortable that way and I'm not.
I think it would be easier for me to visit a nudist beach somewhere, than showing my photographs to these guys.

 

[mmaria]

My experiences with other photographers, particularly in clubs, is that they are less than they seem at first.
It's nice to have friends who are photographers if only because you can talk about common joys.
I go to a local club but don't expect really to learn anything; I go for the comradery.

In terms of how you will 'measure up', you have nothing to be concerned about.

I saw these guys in various juries and with various diplomas, on photographs, on their website. As I already mention they have certain photography ranks or "how do you say that" from "The International Federation of Photographic Art".
So, I really can't measure up with them but I hope they (or at least one of them) won't be jerks and I'll learn something from them.

I've never seen any of your work large enough to see the technical stuff but that's really ancillary.

I agree and I'm not that concerned about technical stuff because I'll revisit and re-edit every picture I intent to print. The next trouble is "Which one I could print and show?"

You have what most people don't have - and never get.
You have a vision, you know what you want to create and see - everything else can be learned if you need it.

ok... I'm going to copy this, to be able to read it when I need it.
Thank you for saying that!

I remember the first work of yours I saw, that picture, taken through a doorway at a low angle, of an old woman in the next room and I thought at that time that you really had something that can't be taught, that feeling for how to make an image that conveys what you see.

Oh God, I don't even know the picture you mentioned... because I have a couple of photographs that fits in the description

 

[mmaria]

I guess I never have understood all this angst over photography. What is the big deal about not being good enough? Good enough for what? Good enough for who?

Who exactly is your competition? Who is the judge of what you do?

well... in general picture, I'm competing with myself.
Good enough for what? Good enough for the world to see what I've done.
I could show the world how I draw and I won't be nervous even for a bit because I can't draw, that's the fact and it won't change. I'm not embarrassed by it nor I want to be good at it because I simply can't draw. It's not my thing.
Photography, hair cutting, driving and similar... I want to be good at it. I want to be better all the time. I want to be capable. I care about it.

The entire world has become political. No matter where you go, there will be someone who wants you to be inferior to them. You will be, when you allow yourself to be. If you are willing to become intimidated by the opinion of someone you don't know from Adam, then that's your decision.

That's true but... If someone who wants me to be inferior to them is a complete jerk regardless of photography I won't feel inferior because I don't feel inferior to those kind of people.
I immediately assumed that all of those "masters of photography" are good people and are willing to help. I'm afraid of their legitimate (according to their experience) opinion.

Strap on a pair!

love this!

Tell me just what you have to lose?

this got me thinking.... so... For the most part, I think I do ok. I'll never be good enough but I'm ok. My photograph was never "evaluated" by anyone else except this forum. And for the most of the compliments I get on this forum I think it's because I'm fairly ok as a person when participating on the forum.
I'm terrified to show my photograph in real life because they don't know me as a person, they'll evaluate just a photograph, not the photographer. TPF is a safe place, real life isn't.

If this is a hobby for you, then who cares what you turn out? You do it for your enjoyment and you will only allow someone to take that enjoyment away from you if you are willing to be intimidated by them. Or harassed by them. Or talked down to by them.

You have two feet, you can walk away if someone starts. This isn't a life long commitment you're making. You can find someone who is willing to discuss photography with you. If they don't exist in this group, then you tried and you don't go back. There are cliques which appeal to snobs. Ignore them unless you are willing to be a snob too.

That perfectly makes sense in every part of my life but photography. It turned out that I'm much more sensitive about it than I thought I'd ever be.

I play guitar and I go to the guitar forums on occasion. They're constantly filled with people who are so intimidated by others they don't even know. The fear of the unknown mostly.

What if I embarrass myself?

You won't be the first. Or the last.

They really don't seem to grasp the idea everyone has some talent and your talent doesn't need to be the same as their talent.

They simply can't grasp the idea everyone starts somewhere. No matter who you are, there will be someone better than you and someone who doesn't know something you do.

Then, one day, they finally work up the courage to head to a jam session and they find most people at a jam are also there looking for someone to play with. And to have a good time.

Most jams are very easy going places and they'll allow you to sit back and play rhythm or they'll hand you a simple lead for a few bars of a 12 bar blues. Very, very few jams are the type where someone is out to be the ass who makes everyone else miserable. The groups tend to weed those folks out.

And when these players come back from their first jam, they almost always find they are better players because they put themself in a position that was outside of their comfort zone of sitting alone in their bedroom. Pretty soon they're making the jam a regular occurrence.

If you want to not be part of a group, sit at home. If you want to be intimidated by someone on the phone, sit at home. If you want to never be told you have something interesting to say, sit at home.

If you want none of that, go to the club.

I'm not thinking in the terms of embarrassing myself in front of anyone but I am intimidated.


ok... just to say... this really helps!

Replying on what you all said got me really thinking and I'm really grateful.

Got to save this whole thread.

 

[mmaria]

I've seen several stand-out images posted here, so why not just get off your butt and re-process them for printing and have them printed??????? You don't have to make wall art, but some nice 8x10s or 11x14s, 3-4, that would be more than a respectable portfolio for a local club. As Lew mentions, your 'old woman' shot was really good, and you've done a couple of recent ones that would be equally strong... quit the pity-party and get on with it!

Love the tone! Thank you

but but but... (it's not local club, you have to read what I wrote additionally)
could you, would you, will you go on my flickr or fb (not everything is same) and post links on what images you think are worthy of printing?

Please

 

[mmaria]

What can I tell to myself?

'Self, I see how different opinions are because I spend enough time reading posts on TPF'. You can't please everyone, so make your art to please yourself. There are enough of us out there to always have someone that will enjoy your vision.

I know that everyone won't like what I do. That's premise I started with. I'm not trying to please anyone but I really want that at least one person finds interesting what I do

 

[mmaria]

I hope you find a club or photo buddy mmaria. Don't quit, that's easy. I joined one right about the same time I joined here. The salty guy from the group took me under his wing. Funny thing is, I suspect he is not well liked by the majority in group because he speaks his mind. He is accomplished and yells at me a lot.. But I like it, my wife does the same thing so I feel at home. He says I'm in to much of a hurry. He is becoming a good friend and I learn a lot from him. I'm the only one in the group that is not a professional so it's a little intimidating. Last meeting I was totally lost, just listened and viewed. They are a room full of Derrel's which is a good thing but my head can get that spinning feeling. I make good coffee I'm told.[emoji4]

Oh lol thank you for making me laugh!

If I meet one good person there I'll feel like I accomplished a lot.

(although a room full of Derrel's isn't something I imagine as that good because then people would talk primarily about equipment and i don't talk about equipment)

 

[mmaria]

What I remember first seeing your photos is that you showed some talent, and probably would continue to learn and practice and get even better as you go. You've only been a photographer for 6 years, that isn't very long for those of us who have been photographers for, um years...

Maybe just go to one meeting, as a visitor/guest, and see what it's like. It might be a good fit for you, or not. You've only talked to one person so far, go see what the rest of the bunch is like.

There isn't a club in my area but I enjoy art exhibit openings, they give you little snacks on little sticks, and there's wine! I find that going to an event etc. might just be a one time thing, or it might lead to some other opportunity - just try going once and see where it leads (or doesn't). Then if you want to join and get a portfolio together people here could help you with that.

And when you feel nervous, remind yourself to breathe (really, helps you be a little more calm). I would still get nervous/excited to talk to a group or whatever, even after years of running meetings etc. I think it's a matter of getting over the hump, getting started and then the nervous excitement eases up. Breathe!!! lol

6 years seemed to me like eternity, but you're right, I have so many years ahead of me.

They don't have meetings, the man I spoke with told me that membership fee is paid in February and I should contact them in February and we'll talk details then unless I actually meet someone of them in the exhibition next week. So I have time to prepare myself psychologically, see what they did so far, pick up myself after this mess and prepare prints.

I know I want to join because I don't have many options in this state at all... the problem here is am I good enough to join.

Breathing...I'll remember that

 

[mmaria]

I'm not a very social person so I won't be of any help to you on this.

I recently drove 12 hours to Ann Arbor to do the FPP Photo Walk because I wanted to meet some of the folks from the FPP podcast, and a few of their associates who I enjoy listening to. That's just about the only "social" I have done over the last 35 years of photography (not counting exhibit openings when I do a show).

All I can say is never worry about what others think of your work, don't give them purchase in your head. Do what you want, be who you want, shoot what you want any way you want to and if others like it that's just dandy... if they don't, well, that's their problem.

well I was doing exactly that since I started with photography.
I do what I like to do and someone likes it someone doesn't but showing pictures online isn't same as being a part of an exhibition and show your photography to the photographers that are really good in what they do. I've never done photo walks either (except walking and taking pictures with Leo and her boyfriend )
I need to find a way to think like that even in real life.

 

[mmaria]

First, you are your own worst critic and you're much better than you think you are.

Second, don't worry so much about what the others may think. Chances are, they are just as insecure, and if they're not, then they're probably overrating themselves Screw 'em!

Oh woman!

"Screw 'em" part helps a lot!

...and I'll certainly use your other suggestion

 

[mmaria]

Let me assure you mmaria that your work is simply excellent and absolutley deserves a place in a gallery. Latley I've only seen you get better as you refine your ideas and it is absolutley working. Now I've spent a bit of time in some art galleries in various countries, been to a fair few local art shows too and if I saw your shots there you bet I'd be stopping to look.

aaaawwwwwwwww Pete

All I heard is that you said you'd stop to look. That's exactly what I would like to achieve! (if I actually reach that point)

 

[mmaria]

You have a camera on the way -- you are not allowed to quit. Seriously, you do fine work so don't worry about it; get a few of your better shots printed and see what happens.

I wouldn't stop with photography and sharing it online. I just want to step out in the real world with it and I'm absolutely terrified.

 

[mmaria]

Yes Your work is very good.Keep doing what your doing.

I will... but that means I'll share what I do online

 

[mmaria]

Marija, you go excellent work. You've got the eye. Take your work that you have on Flickr and print a few - mainly to understand how the printed image will look. You have enough to put together a theme. When I originally joined my local camera club, I felt very intimidated at the beginning. There were people there with so much experience, so much good gear! And then, looking that the images in the competitions - I found that the range of ability was very wide. Certainly some images were breath-takingly beautiful. But so many more were "pretty" but rather conventional and formulaic. So many were trying to imitate other images that they saw and admired. When I put my images up in the competitions, they actually were somewhere in the middle of the pack - not the best, but certainly not the worse either. I would say your eye is actually better than mine, and your processing skills are better as well. Put on your brave face, print some of your images and share them. Remember, the only things they can give you are their opinions.

You ARE a photographer. You don't need to convince anyone of that. You do want to share and learn. That's what it is all about.

awww Paul ... just.... just...

Would you pls, take the time and suggest what I could print?