That is a pretty big part of photography, people forget that photography doesn't stop when you've taken the picture, it's why people complain about my composition when it wasn't really my question however justified they were in pointing it out. This was just a random snapshot i took that had different enough colours and things in it so i could dissect as much information out of it as i could.
Your original question was what can be done to improve on how you've edited the image. Comments on composition are a very necessary response to that, because composition to a degree can be changed with editing and it certainly affects what editing is necessary.
My approach to any image starts with how to frame it. I almost always crop to a 5:4 aspect ratio rather than the camera's 3:2. I shoot a little wide to start with, full well knowing that will allow very precise framing later when I can view the image full size on a good monitor. Of course that also requires that first one has to decide exactly what the image is intended to be.
As I noted in a previous post this shot could be a straight portrait, could be and environmental portrait, or it could be one of at least a couple different styles of Street Photography. When I look at it, what I like is the Street angle, but not one of purist "Straight Photography" and instead something that leans back towards an environmental portrait. So that is the way I crop the framing...
I only want background showing the relationship between the central object and the surroundings. The excess dead space to the left is not needed, and for that matter neither is the detail around the fellow on the left. The red dress of the girl is grossly distracting and there isn't enough of her there to make it useful. She gets cloned out. Then the fellow on the right has to be "adjusted" to be less significant than the fellow on the left in all ways. We have no choice about that because he is already blurred. The trick is to make sure that what detail is there is not lost, but that none of it is distracting from the dominance of the right hand guy. Just the right brightness and contrast were needed. And that brought up an interesting problem because there is a blob of lighter area right on the bridge of his nose that becomes excessively distracting. Because it is blurred I can't tell if it is something he is wearing or something behind him. Regardless, it was cloned out.
The fellow on the left exhibits something not everyone will like, but I happen to favor unequal eyes. I always try to unbalance them to some degree, and this is a great case. I left the right eye as it was, but very carefully applied Unsharp Mask to the eye on the left.
This is the result: