Corry's Joke of the Day Thread

Two Arab parents are sitting in a Gaza bar chatting over a couple of glasses of fermented goats milk.
Fairly soon the wonderful ambience and the goats milk gets them reminiscing and one pulls out his wallet and starts flipping through his family pictures.

"This is my handsome oldest son Mohammed.......he's a martyr."

" This is my wonderful second son Habib........he too is a martyr."

" This is my wonderful daughter Fatimah.......she also is a martyr."

After a pause and a deep sigh the second Arab says wistfully; "Ah, they blow up so fast, don't they?"
 
Digital Matt said:
Hehehe...

Mentos, here in the US, (I don't know about other countries), you can go to a store and fill out a gift registry, which is gifts you would like to get, and then when people buy you wedding presents, you tell them to go to this store, and they can see what other people have bought already, and make sure you get something you want, but not what someone else bought.

Ugg, make sense now? :p
Click to expand...


buahahahaha now yes :D:D:D:D hahaha thank you for explanation:)
 
Codeword For Sex

A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word "Typewriter".

One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter".

The child told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded, "Tell your daddy that he can't type a letter right now cause there is a red ribbon in the typewriter." The child went back to tell her father what mommy said.

A few days later the mom told the daughter, "Tell daddy that he can type that letter now."

The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced, "Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."
 
Little boy
A little boy came down to breakfast. Since he lived on a farm, his mother asked if he had done his chores.

“Not yet,” said the little boy. His mother tells him he can’t have any breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he’s a little pissed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal. “How come I don’t get any eggs and bacon? Why don’t I have any milk in my cereal?” he asks.

“Well,” his mother says, “I saw you kick a chicken, so you don’t get any eggs. I saw you kick the pig, so you don’t get any bacon, either. I also saw you kick the cow, so you aren’t getting any milk this morning.”

Just about then, his father comes down for breakfast, and he kicks the cat as he’s walking into the kitchen. The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, “Are you going to tell him, or should I?”
 
LOL. call me slow or whatever, but I had to read the last paragraph twice before it clicked.
 
oh Corry the typewriter is .. .. I can't stop laughing :) but I still don't get the one with kicking a cat...
 
hahahaha thank you for explanaion :D oh... now I see that I have a lot to learn as far as your language is concerned :D:D
 
An old Italian man lived alone in the country. He wanted to dig his tomato garden, but it was very hard work as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,

I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.
Love Dad

A few days later he received a letter from his son:

Dear Dad,

Not for nothing, but don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the BODIES.
Love Vinnie


At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.

That same day the old man received another letter from his son:

Dear Dad,

Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.

Love Vinnie
 
An Amish boy and his father were visiting a nearby mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny silver walls that moved apart and back together again by themselves.
The lad asked, "What is this, father?"

The father (having never seen an elevator) responded, "I have no idea what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched as small circles lit up above the walls.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful twenty-four-year-old woman stepped out.

The father looked at his son anxiously and said, "Go get your mother."
 
hhaha that's great too :)
but who is "Amish boy" ?? from which country?? I'm just curious... :)
 
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