how to politely decline shooting a wedding

[elsaspet]

And BTW, kuddos to you to not cave in to do something you don't like and don't feel ready to do. I wish a tenth of people had your good sense.

 

[asfixiate]

Apparantly I didn't catch the screw you part. All I can say is that's crazy and I wouldn't do it even if I had every bit of equipment at my fingertips. That attitude is totally unacceptable. Single mothers have it tough enough as it is yet alone working for free.

I agree 100% that you shouldn't do anything you dont' want to do especially if you'r treated that way.

I agree with elsaspet 100%

Also sorry I didn't read the thread all the way before I "opened my mouth". Those would be my recommendation if the person had a good attitude and you were slightly interested in weddings.

 

[kellylindseyphotography]

the safe word is...









*cookies*





lmao

 

[asfixiate]

little sidebar for ya. I love your portraits. They are very wholesome...did i spell whoesome right?

 

[kellylindseyphotography]

little sidebar for ya. I love your portraits. They are very wholesome...did i spell whoesome right?

Thats an adjetive I haven't heard to describe my shots hehe, thanks Brownie points for you :hugs:

 

[asfixiate]

I don't have kids but am getting married in October and hope to have kids not to long from that. When i look at your shots I feel like they're my kids. Not sure how else to describe it.

 

[Ben-71]

<< my cousin is getting married. my whole family thinks i'm a built in photographer.... .... WHy do people think that just becasue you have a camera and like photography that you want to shoot their wedding for them for free? >>

Hi...
'If you can't beat them, join them'...
Let's try and look at it from a different angle...

If you insist on refusing, they'll all be angry at you.
If you take the pictures, there's a chance that they may like them.
In the first case, you loose for sure. In the second, there's a chance...

Now, how do you feel about your child photography? Good?
If so, the only difference is that this time the kids play 'wedding'...

What I mean is, that poeple are people.
You like taking pictures of little poeple. Why not regard it as a chance
to get some experience at documentary photography?

Why not look at the "job" itself from a different angle:
This is a chance to walk around and capture some special moments.
An emotional hug of the bride and her mother.
A kid under a table.
The closeness between the groom with his friends, etc'.

If you think that you can capture some special moments, you could give them a CD that will be better than what most pros can, because you know the poeple, you know what pic' captures them most typically.

so, if you say no, they're all angry. If you say yes, you may gain experience, and maybe apreciation...

I'm not a wedding phot', by the way... but I've been "in your shoes"...

Best luck either way

 

[Mav]

Oh. My. God.

Stay home. It's not that I think you can't do it, but you are seeing only the beginning of what "free family photography" amounts to. If you like your family, don't attend the wedding at all.

+1

 

[MRivera]

Wow...lot of different responses here... There is a thin line when comes to family and favors. IMHO I think you should give it a try and do it. someone suggested to give them an album from Ritz camera, that could be a good present. The rest yo could give them a CD so they print out other images they might like.
Most importantly be upfront with them and let them know it is the first time you are photographying a wedding who knows maybe you could use one of the images for your site or portfolio. Ask another friend who might be interesting in photography to go with you and help you out... That could be fun.

 

[Ben-71]

Just read about that mail... so I'd add this:

If I felt abused, and wouldn't be able to enjoy taking the pictures, I wouldn't do it.
I turned down 2 or 3 true job, offered by people I "too much didn't like".
It boils down to - "Can I addopt a possitive attitude, or not".

If the only way I could see it is that I'm forced into it, I wouldn't do it.

 

[abraxas]

...

Let's try and look at it from a different angle...

...​

^ All that.​

 

[usayit]

Sorry Mom I don't want to shoot...

<SMACK>

Ok Mom.. I'll guess I'll do it if they help with expenses

<SMACK>

Ok Mom.. I'll do it for free..


Hmmm... doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. I agree with elsaspet.. Run... you are in a no-win situation. About the worst no-win situation any son/daughter can possibly be placed in.


Sorry for being blunt.

 

[John_Olexa]

Oh, go and take some shots! It ain't gonna kill ya, and ya might actually have some fun.

I agree!
Read up on it and it your best shot. It will be a good learning experience.


I have shot 3 weddings where the couple couldn't afford to pay the going rates (no I don't call myself a wedding photographer, Just helping them out) heck they all turned out pretty good.. plenty good enough that people call me and ask how much I charge. I just used flash with a softbox on it. nothing fancy . This was before I went digital!!Heck now with photoshop you should be able to make just about any shot look good. Give them a CD of the shots and your done.

 

[quickshot]

I totally agree. My mom thinks it would be a "great wedding present" and that I'll look very selfish declining. Since I'm the "photographer in the family".. I'm an amateur, and I shoot children. Soooo far from being a wedding photographer.

They again used the "well, just take what you can! I'm sure it will be great" I'm considering leaving my camera at home completely and saying I forgot it on accident.

You're part of the family and you want to be part of the celebration, and that won't be easy if you've got your face behind a camera the whole time. Just tell your cousin that you want to be able to enjoy the wedding and have fun on their special day, instead of treating it as a "job".

 

[rubbertree]

"screw you asshole"
OMG, you are a better person than me for not killing your mother after hearing that!
If it were me, I'd just not go at all. But if you do, and if you take the shots, at the very least upload them to a website where people can pick and order (and pay) for whatever prints they like. Don't even suggest that you will order the prints for them, just say, "if you want to order prints the pictures can be ordered from XYZ site".