This here thread inspired me to write to NASCAR about their racing. Thought I would CC: you all in on the letter I sent them.
Dear NASCAR,
Me and bunch of other fellers were discussing computers totherday and was marvelin over how much some of them there fancy computers cost. There be a whole mess a folks that build their own computers out of cheaper parts and they swear that they be just a good r even better then them machines what is engineered to exacting specifications. Heck if’n that there be tru, why yoall could save a heap of money if you would quite using all them high priced stuff and start racing on the cheap. Here be a list what we done come up with to save money.
1. quite using that high priced custom blended gasoline. The quickie-mart selling regular unleaded for $2.51 a gallon. If you wanta save even more on fuel costs, buy all your hotdogs, nachos and beer that you sell at the refreshment stands at Kroger. Fer evey $100 you spend on groceries you get a dime off on your gas. Heck if you were to by $1000 worth a food from them theyed give you a hole dollar off per gallon.
2. Quit using them there fancy racing tires. These here tires from walmart only be $408.00 a set and they come with a 50,000 mileage guarentee. Shoot them cars could go a whole season on just one or to set a tires instead of putting on them fancy racing tires ever 100 miles or so.
3. Quite using them fancy frames and bodies and such. One of the fellers was telling how the bestes car he ever had was a 1980 Pinto. Go get a whole bunch of them there suckers from the salvage yard and give them out to all the fellers you got racing. Won’t need near as many of them there dang ole pit stops to fix stuff and adjust stuff an all. Weld a plate behind the gas tank though, them pintos tend to blow up if you hit em in from behind. Heck if you want some real fun letem use Chevy Vegas and AMC gremlins too.
4. Oh yeah, use Seran wrap on them windshields stead of them fancy tear offs. Hole roll of seran wrap is only $2.25.
5. Quite putting all that fancy roll bars window nets and such in the cars. Just roll the windows down and they don’t need all that stuff nor them fancy water drinking things Get a good cup holder for the window and a 64oz slurpy from the 7-11 and them boys be good fer the whole race.
6. Stop using them there fancy dancy engines. The 2.3L 88hp pinto engine was a doozy. Why I bet you could overclock that thing to 93 or 94 hp easy. What more does a feller need? Look how much you will save on them dang restrictor plates. Don’t need one on a Pinto motor.
Well, hope me an the boys have given ya some good idears for improving NASCAR. Looking forward to the changes. Shoot, you might even be able to get the cub scouts to sponser it since it will be more like the pinewood derby they run.
Boogitie, boogitie boogitie. :mrgreen:
Dear NASCAR,
Me and bunch of other fellers were discussing computers totherday and was marvelin over how much some of them there fancy computers cost. There be a whole mess a folks that build their own computers out of cheaper parts and they swear that they be just a good r even better then them machines what is engineered to exacting specifications. Heck if’n that there be tru, why yoall could save a heap of money if you would quite using all them high priced stuff and start racing on the cheap. Here be a list what we done come up with to save money.
1. quite using that high priced custom blended gasoline. The quickie-mart selling regular unleaded for $2.51 a gallon. If you wanta save even more on fuel costs, buy all your hotdogs, nachos and beer that you sell at the refreshment stands at Kroger. Fer evey $100 you spend on groceries you get a dime off on your gas. Heck if you were to by $1000 worth a food from them theyed give you a hole dollar off per gallon.
2. Quit using them there fancy racing tires. These here tires from walmart only be $408.00 a set and they come with a 50,000 mileage guarentee. Shoot them cars could go a whole season on just one or to set a tires instead of putting on them fancy racing tires ever 100 miles or so.
3. Quite using them fancy frames and bodies and such. One of the fellers was telling how the bestes car he ever had was a 1980 Pinto. Go get a whole bunch of them there suckers from the salvage yard and give them out to all the fellers you got racing. Won’t need near as many of them there dang ole pit stops to fix stuff and adjust stuff an all. Weld a plate behind the gas tank though, them pintos tend to blow up if you hit em in from behind. Heck if you want some real fun letem use Chevy Vegas and AMC gremlins too.
4. Oh yeah, use Seran wrap on them windshields stead of them fancy tear offs. Hole roll of seran wrap is only $2.25.
5. Quite putting all that fancy roll bars window nets and such in the cars. Just roll the windows down and they don’t need all that stuff nor them fancy water drinking things Get a good cup holder for the window and a 64oz slurpy from the 7-11 and them boys be good fer the whole race.
6. Stop using them there fancy dancy engines. The 2.3L 88hp pinto engine was a doozy. Why I bet you could overclock that thing to 93 or 94 hp easy. What more does a feller need? Look how much you will save on them dang restrictor plates. Don’t need one on a Pinto motor.
Well, hope me an the boys have given ya some good idears for improving NASCAR. Looking forward to the changes. Shoot, you might even be able to get the cub scouts to sponser it since it will be more like the pinewood derby they run.
Boogitie, boogitie boogitie. :mrgreen:
